Fated to Broken Love
by KaiaLuna
Summary: A second chance to change destiny and right the path of fate. Bella is certain where the path will lead, to happily ever after with Edward and the Cullens, but when it doesn't... can it be that all she feels is happiness and love? Will she get the happily ever after she never expected or does fate and the cruel destiny of life have more in store for her?
1. Chapter 1

**Found some older stuff. I am fixing up a bit and posting. Hoping it will kick start my writing again. Hope you all enjoy. Please review. And I own no rights to Twilight, everything recognizable belongs to Stephanie Meyer. **

Fate and destiny, the words seem interchangeable, but they aren't. Fate is predestined, it's something that was supposed to happen, someone you were supposed to meet, it's the greater plan. Destiny is the path you've chosen to take but whatever road you choose it leads to the same thing, the journey is just a little different along the way. Very rarely fate is thrown off course and you have a chance to change fate or to fix it.

I learned this not so very long ago. Of course I was sure I knew what my fate was and I knew I wanted it, that I was destroyed in having lost it.

It was sometime after Edward left, after I found out about the wolves. Jacob had promised to take me cliff jumping. I knew there was a storm coming but I needed to hear his voice. The fall was exhilarating, the water icy cold, I felt alive, right up until the current took me and I crashed up into the cliff.

I came to in a dark cave, a woman humming gently.

"It's alright, you're alright." She told me gently.

"Where am I?"

"A cave, the opening is under the water near the cliffs."

"Who are you?"

"An agent of fate."

"An angel?" At this point, having been around vampires and werewolves, I wasn't sure anything would really surprise me.

"No." She laughed a little.

"A demon?" Not a bad idea to ask.

She laughed again, "No."

"What then?"

"Perhaps a little of both, as most people are."

I nodded at her and brought a shaky hand to my head, there was blood when I looked at my fingers.

"A small cut, nothing to worry over." She assured me.

"How do we get out of here?"

"When the storm passes. Now it is raging and you have a choice."

"What choice?"

"Your fate was pushed off course, you are being given the chance to fix it or to change it, if you will. Whatever destiny you choose, only you have the power to set fate right or change everything."

I frowned at her, "What do you mean."

"One instant, the path of your destiny, changed fate Bella. I'd like to give you the chance to fix it."

I nodded, what else could I do, Edward was my destiny, I was sure of it, if something stole that fate from us then I would take any chance to correct it.

"Things might not be what you think they are Bella, be careful, we choose our destinies but fate has a plan, now that the plan is thrown off course, the path you choose, can lead you where it ought to or somewhere unknown, changing the fate of more than just yourself." I nodded. "Rest now."

It wasn't so bad an idea, my head was beginning to hurt and I felt a little dizzy.


	2. Chapter 2

I blinked open my eyes to a woman in uniform leaning over me, "Sorry to wake you miss but we've landed."

"Landed?"

She nodded, "In Port Angeles."

Port Angeles? I nodded to her, still confused and de-boarded the plane. Charlie was waiting for me.

"It's good to see you Bells." He smiled at me.

"You too dad." I replied, still lost in my own thoughts, like what the fuck was going on?

He didn't say much on the drive home but from what I pieced together, no it couldn't be, but… could it? It couldn't have been a dream, I could still feel the hole, _they'd_ left me with but here Charlie was picking me up from the airport, asking me about my flight from Phoenix, how mom and Phil were and if I remembered Jake who I used to play with and his father Billy. Then there was my truck, my homecoming gift. If it was all a dream, why was it the same?

When I woke up in the morning Charlie asked me if I needed him to take me to the school for my first day, it hadn't been a dream, or had it all been a dream, a painful premonition, or had I gone back? Had the woman who'd saved me from drowning sent me back in time to fix my fate? Did I have a second chance with Edward?

I hurried to school, everything was the same as the first time I'd had my first day here. I met the same people and they asked the same questions and then, at lunch, I saw them. They were more impressive and beautiful than I remembered. I felt a wave of such love and sorrow as I looked at them. Jessica was speaking to me but I felt the pain clawing at my chest, then calm filled me. I looked over at the Cullen table to find Jasper watching me, deep in thought. I sent him a smile in gratitude and it seemed to shock him. I laughed a little. All the Cullen's were staring at me now. I nodded to them and turned back to Jessica who was trying to get my attention. It wasn't until I walked into biology that I remembered Edward's initial reaction to me, to my blood. I hoped he had the strength to resist again.

I sent him a small smile as I sat down. He glared at me, eyes at their blackest, shifting his chair further away from me, holding his hand to his mouth.

"My name's Bella." I told him, hoping it would help to humanize me quicker for him. "You're Edward Cullen." I smiled thinking they were like the first words he had spoken to me. He nodded and turned away from me. I focused on class, or pretended to, all the while thanking whatever spirit, angel, demon woman it was that gave me this second chance.

Edward wasn't at school the next day; I wasn't surprised; he'd be back in a week, like last time.

I watched the Cullen's as surreptitiously as I could. I missed them. I missed Alice. I didn't really want to wait so long for us to be friends this time. When Edward got back, I'd convince him that everything would work out. I wouldn't make the same mistakes as before.

When Friday rolled around I went to the reservation with Charlie and we had dinner with Billy and Jacob. I couldn't help but grin at the scrawnier, human sixteen year old Jake, though his warm grin was still my smile, he was still my sun.

On Saturday I found myself back up at the reservation, I wasn't sure why I felt so drawn there, maybe it was the memories, I'd been safe here. I went to the cliff's to think; maybe I was drawn here because the demon angel woman had worked her magic here. I kind of owed her a thank you. Edward would be back at school tomorrow and I would have a second chance.

I turned at a noise and slipped on a wet rock. I fell hard and smacked my head. I heard laughter and a large warm hand helped me up.

"Alright Paleface?" He asked.

I looked up, into his eyes and felt my breath escape in a whoosh. His rich dark chocolate eyes stared into mine, his grin fading into a look of shock and wonder.

"Paul." I breathed his name.

He helped me to stand, his eyes never leaving mine. "Are you alright? You hit your head."

I smiled and shook my head, "I'm fine."

"I'm Paul, Paul Meraz."

I blushed, "Bella." Of course in this reality, we'd never met, this alternate reality, its what it had to be. A strange alternate reality where Paul didn't hate me, where instead of a sneer his still intense expression didn't express annoyance or anger and instead showed how beautiful he was. No, how sexy, gorgeous, intense, not beautiful. Beautiful didn't cover it.

"Bella." He repeated my name and smiled at me.

I blushed again. "How are you?" Dumb question but I couldn't think of anything to say, I was to distracted by his endless eyes.

He grinned at me, "Better than I've ever been. The best birthday of my existence."

"It's your birthday?"

He nodded, "Eighteenth."

"You're a senior?"

He nodded again, "At the Res School. You must go to Forks High."

"Yeah, I just moved here. I'm Bella Swan, Chief Swan's daughter."

Paul nodded, "He's a good man."

"Yeah." We talked about nothing for a long time, Paul was easy to talk to.

A shout finally broke his attention away. "That's Sam. I have to go."

"Oh." I didn't want him to go, not now that I'd met this alternate universe Paul.

"Would you come with me?"

"Where?"

"Emily's new house. That's Sam's girl friend. She just moved down a few weeks ago from another reservation." He looked away, "She was in the hospital for a bit, she's all healed now but the scars are still really fresh."

I nodded, "It's ok. Are you sure they wont mind me coming."

Paul nodded and grinned, "They'll love you." He stood up and offered me his hand, lifting me effortlessly to my feet and leading me down a path I'd never seen before to the beach. He never let go of my hand as he led me down the beach on a back way to Emily's house.

Jared came out on the porch and laughed, "So much for fucking rare!" Paul growled at him but Jared ignored it and jumped off the porch coming over to meet us, "I'm Jared. Paul's best friend since diapers, come on in and meet Sam, Emily and my girl Kim."

I followed Jared inside but I was distracted by his words, rare, what was rare? Imprinting? Could Paul have imprinted on me? Not real Paul but alternate reality Paul? Why did the idea make me feel so warm and tingly?

Numbly I let Paul lead me inside and distractedly greeted the others as they were introduced. We all had lunch together and then I found myself sitting outside with Paul. He told me the old legends before telling me what I already knew; Paul was a werewolf.

I nodded and he seemed to regard me for a long time. "I'm serious Bella. I can show you."

I nodded and then shook my head, "I know you're serious Paul." I turned to him, "You don't need to prove it. I believe you."

"That's it? You believe me and its ok?"

I smiled at him and nodded, "Yeah. That's it."

"Shit." He swore, "Sorry." He said smiling sheepishly at me, "That went a fuck ton of a lot easier than I expected."

I laughed and nudged him with my shoulder, "I guess I'm kinda good with weird."

"I hope so."

"Sorry?"

"Oh, nothing, its just, never mind."

"Paul?"

"I was wondering if maybe I could take you out. You know for dinner or something sometime?"

"Sure." I shrugged smiling.

He beamed at me, his eyes shinning, "Great. Tonight?"

I laughed, "Sure. Tonight."

"We could see a movie."

"Ok."

Paul led the way, he took me to a truck more battered than my beast and handed me inside. We talked the entire drive to Port Angeles. When we arrived he got tickets to the early showing and we spent the next hour walking around and talking until it was time.

His arm wrapped around me in the theater and I curled into his side, reveling in the warmth. After the movie I called Charlie, when he didn't answer I called Billy, they'd gone fishing that morning and were likely still together watching a game.

Jacob answered after the second ring.

"Hey Jake, it's Bella. Is Charlie there?"

"Uh, yeah, he's watching baseball with dad. Everything cool? Sam Uley stopped by to talk to dad and said you were helping him out with some stuff and were down on the res? You coming over when you're done? We ordered pizza."

"Sam did?"

"Yeah."

"Oh well, no actually I'm in Port Angeles now and was going to eat here. I just didn't want Charlie to worry."

"Right. Next time maybe?"

"Sure Jake."

"Hold a sec. I'll grab him for you."

A moment later and Charlie came on the phone, "Hey Bells. Having a good time? It's real nice of you to help Emily Young get settled. Terrible what happened to her with that bear."

"Yeah, right. Sorry I didn't call earlier or leave a note."

"No worries. I'm just going to have some pizza and watch the game with Billy. Have fun at the party tonight. Will you be home in the morning or spend tomorrow with your friends?"

Huh? "Oh, um, I don't really know."

"Ok, well, I'm fishing with Harry Clearwater in the morning anyways so I will just see you for dinner tomorrow."

"Ok. Thanks. Enjoy the game."

"Bye Bells."

I hung up the pay phone and went over to Paul, "Sam told Billy I was helping Emily tonight?"

"Oh, yeah." He blushed a little. "Em just moved down to the res and we were all going to go over, light a fire, hang out. Kim is spending the night and she thought you might like to as well."

"OK." I shrugged smiling up at him. He led us to a burger place and we ordered food. He ate one double bacon burger and large fries in the time it took me to eat a quarter of my burger. I saw him shifting and looking at the menu and wondered if he was trying not to freak me out too much after I took the werewolf thing so well.

"You should eat more. That had to be like a snack for you. Besides being four times my size and a growing boy, your metabolism has to be like seven times as fast as other people." I teased him.

He grinned at me, "Yeah, kinda."

"Eat. It wont freak me out to see that you can consume an entire cow in one sitting."

He laughed and got two more of the giant burgers. When I was done I also gave him my leftovers.

He drove us back to Emily's house. They were out back around a fire pit, roasting marshmallows and making smores. We spent the next few hours laughing and telling stories. By the end of the night I felt as though I'd known them all my life.

In the morning we made a huge breakfast and watched the boys toss around the ball and then play fight, both as people and as wolves. Paul only left my side twice, both times to run a quick patrol.

When it was time to say goodbye we sat in his truck, beside mine, still parked in the space near the cliff for a long time.

"Bella?"

"Yeah Paul."

"I need to tell you something."

"About?"

"Me."

"Ok."

"And you."

"Ok."

"It doesn't really have to mean, well, there's this thing."

It clicked what he was trying to tell me, "You imprinted on me."

"Yeah." He sighed. Then his head whipped up and around to me, "What?"

"It's ok." I shrugged. "We'll figure it out."

"How did you know?"

"The others all told their stories last night and Jared said something when I first got there yesterday." I shrugged. I didn't want to lie to him but what could I say, I came from a parallel world where I already knew all about werewolves and imprints? A parallel world where he hated me and my ex was a vampire who'd shattered me heart and soul.

"Right. So, well, yeah." He shrugged.

"See you tomorrow?" I asked him.

He nodded and turned to me smiling, "I'll call you tonight."

I grinned back at him, "Ok." I nodded and got out of his truck and drove home. I was in my own little world when Charlie came home. Even he noticed how happy I was.

"Well?" He asked as he sat at the table for dinner.

"Well what?" I responded dishing out the chicken.

"You seem really happy."

"I am." I agreed sitting down.

"Any reason?"

I blushed, "I met someone."

He huffed, "Paul Meraz has been in some trouble Bella. Billy and Harry says he's changed and is real smitten but you just be careful. I'm glad you're happy and all, I know myself he's an ok kid but he's had it a bit rough since his dad died and has been in more trouble than I'd like."

"How did you…" I was so red I thought my skin was burning.

He shifted uncomfortably, "Well now, after Sam came by and said you were with him and Harry came to say he saw you all together and how close you looked."

"You're worse than a couple of old women gossiping." I told him laughing.

He shrugged, blushing a little, "It gets to be something and you bring him by for dinner ok? I might have met him before but its different now."

I nodded, "Ok Dad."

I agreed. We ate the rest of our meal in silence.

Paul called as I was cleaning up. We spoke for a few minutes and I told Charlie he was coming by for dinner on Thursday. Charlie just nodded and kept his eyes on his game. I went upstairs to bed.

It wasn't until lunch the next day, when I saw the Cullen's it all really hit me. I'd readily given up my second chance with Edward. From the moment I'd looked into this Paul's eyes I'd been owned by him. No, not owned by him and not lost in him, I'd been those things with Edward, from the moment I'd met Paul, this Paul, it was like I'd been wrapped in warmth and love. I'd felt, beautiful, complete and relaxed for the first time, maybe ever.

It was bitter sweet to look at them, so close but still not one of them. In this universe I didn't belong with them, I didn't belong with Edward. If this was my second chance then had I truly never been meant for their family? Never been meant to love Edward? Had my love for him blinded me to Paul? Could anything blind me to Paul? If it had always been Paul, why hadn't he imprinted the first time? Or had he and just hated me enough never to say anything? Would my Paul hate me as much as that one had? If Paul wasn't meant to imprint on me why had he this time? My head was starting to hurt, no where near how much my heart was and yet I was wrapped in a warm bubble of calm and relaxation keeping me from falling apart.

I looked up as someone moved into my peripheral vision.

"Jasper?" I questioned. Of course, he was sending me calm.

He didn't say anything, just held out his hand to me. I put mine in his and let him lead me out of the cafeteria and into the damp but thankfully covered courtyard.

"You alright Darlin?" Had Jasper ever called me that before? It made me blush as I nodded. "I'm a pretty good listener."

I smiled at him letting my eyes meet his gold and black ones. "I'm ok, I think, am I?" I asked him, unsure how much his gift was affecting me. Our eyes met and I could tell he was assessing me. "I can't really tell you how I know, but I know what you are, all of you and what you can do. I wont tell anyone."

He nodded, still regarding me carefully. "Those are some pretty intense emotions."

I nodded, "Its complicated."

"Anything I can do?"

I shrugged, "I appreciate you keeping me together in there."

He nodded. "Its not the first time."

I shook my head, "Far from it."

"You did recognize us the first day?"

I nodded. "I wont ever say anything. You can trust me."

"I know. I can feel it." He hesitated, "You felt some pretty strong things looking at us, looking at Alice."

"I miss her."

"Miss her?"

I nodded, "It's really complicated."

"You're sitting with a centuries old empathic vampire whom you mysteriously recognize and know things about. I'd say we passed complicated."

I laughed, "Yeah, well add in the imprinted on by a werewolf who was supposed to hate her and you've maybe got the tip of the ice burg of my current complicated."

He nodded and I felt a fresh surge of calm, "How far past freaked out am I right now?"

He shrugged, "I'd say almost half a breath from full mental breakdown."

I laughed and leaned my head against his arm, "Can you just sit with me for a minute, please." The wave of sadness beginning to swamp me was derailed by a wave of affection and comfort making me sigh and close my eyes.

After a few minutes of comfortable silence I asked him, "Is Alice watching?"

"I'd reckon so."

"I never knew you had an accent."

"Born and bred and changed in the South. Usually I try to suppress it."

"Is my scent bothering you?"

"Oddly not at all, though it is a very lovely scent."

"Am I still Edward's singer?" It might throw me over the edge of crazy even with Jasper's help if in this universe I wasn't.

He chuckled, "Very much so. He's fairly certain he can control himself. I wont let him hurt you if he can't. I promise."

"Why?"

He sat very still, "I'm not sure. You intrigue me. Your emotions are so pure and very strong for a human. I felt them clearer than anything else, before I even saw you the day you arrived. They all seem tinged with sadness though and it inexplicably bothers me that you are so wounded."

"Can he read my mind?" Please let that one still be a no.

"No." Jasper laughed, "It frustrates and fascinates him as much as your emotions intrigue me."

"How is the family? Esme and Carlisle?"

"Everyone is good. You are the talk of the family, have been all week and after this likely will be for long to come."

"After us talking?"

"I'm not exactly the most verbose in the family let alone the most interactive with humans. Plus if your emotions hadn't been so captivating I'd probably have wanted to kill you to protect the family after learning Edward couldn't read your mind."

I shivered, had my Jasper wanted to kill me when I first came? I was very glad he hadn't. He'd even come to care enough about me to save me from James. "I think I feel ok now."

"Yes." He nodded, "We can still talk about it if you like?"

I sat up and smiled at him, "We should maybe get to class."

"It's about five minutes until final bell." He said with a chuckle, surprising me. How had so much time passed? "The offer stands Bella. I'll listen if you want to talk and sit if you don't."

"Thanks Jazz." I smiled at him. "I think I'd just like to go home now."

He nodded and got up, I saw Alice waiting a little ways away. She waved to me as he moved over to her. I waved and sent her a small smile. I still missed her so much.


	3. Chapter 3

I got in my truck and drove home, the calm of Jasper carrying me until I stood in the kitchen staring at the fridge wondering what I should make Charlie and what I could make for Paul on Thursday. Then it all came rushing back in a crippling wave. Paul. I wasn't supposed to be his imprint.

I dropped to me knees and breathed deeply. This was supposed to be my second chance with Edward, with the fate I knew I was supposed to have. I looked down at my wrist. The one reminder he had never been able to take from me but it was gone. I ran a finger over the smooth and normal temperature skin. It was gone, as though none of it had ever happened. I sat in the fridge and cried.

"Bella!" Paul's frantic voice and the crash of my kitchen door slamming open had me crying harder. I felt his warm arms pull me into his body and shivered, burying my head in his neck. His scent washed over me and I felt calm fill me almost as though Jasper were here too. I knew he wasn't though. It was Paul. I felt safe and whole with him but also strong. I breathed deeply and forced back the tears"

"What happened?" He asked still holding me tightly and rocking me in his arms.

"I…" What did I say? How could I explain any of it? "Nothing." I whispered.

"Bella." He pulled away, hurt swimming in his deep chocolate eyes. "Please?"

"I…" The worry and pain of rejection were clear in his eyes and I lifted my hand to rest on his cheek, "I just, I don't know, I thought," I licked my lips, "I'm scared."

"Of what? What happened?" Immediately his eyes went from hurt to fiercely protective.

"You." I was met by confusion and hurt. "What if its not real." I could at least explain part of the fear. "I'm not Quileute. What if it's a mistake and you aren't really mine?"

He pulled me tight into his chest, "It's not a mistake Bella. You are my imprint. It doesn't matter you aren't Quileute. Nothing in our history says an imprint has to be and Emily is only half Quileute. It doesn't matter, you're my soul mate, your race, ethnicity, religion, none of that is important, our souls are the perfect match."

"Can it be broken though? Or can you be supposed to imprint on someone and don't? Or imprint on the wrong person?"

"No."

"No what?"

"No to any of it. I promise Bella. We might not know everything about imprinting but we do know it only happens once, we only get one soul mate and the bond is unbreakable. Only death will ever part me from you and even then there is thought that death itself couldn't part us for long."

I nodded into his chest, not entirely relieved, after all, the other Paul hadn't imprinted on me. I'd have known if he had. Paul hated me. I shivered at the thought and clung a little tighter to him.

When we finally parted he sat me on the table and quietly, very seriously and with worry still marking his eyes, he told me I stank.

I laughed and asked him to repeat that.

"Vampires have a very distinct scent Bella. Its very strong to us."

"Oh, right, Jasper."

"Jasper?"

"One of the Cullen's." I nodded, "We talked for a bit this afternoon."

"Talked?"

"Yeah." I didn't really want to tell him I'd all but freaked out at school. "We sat together outside talking for a while."

"Bella." He began his tone serious.

"Don't." I stopped him immediately. "Please don't tell me they are dangerous. I already know. I know who and what the Cullen's are, maybe even better than you. I also know exactly what it is I am asking but I am still asking, begging you, please, let me make my own choices. I can't really explain it and I promise to be careful but they are my friends."

"Bella."

"No Paul. I'm not a child. I know what they are and I know what can happen. This isn't your choice to make."

He was shaking and the anger in him was the same as when I'd first met him, when I'd slapped him.

I stepped away in fear and pain of the memory, of Paul hating me.

His eyes widened in surprise and flashed with hurt. A moment later and he'd strode out of my kitchen and into the woods.

I sat on the floor stunned. Was it all really a mistake? Had he not truly imprinted on me? It had only been a few days, I couldn't be in love with him but he'd walked away from me. Why did the supernatural always promise me forever only to walk away? What was wrong with me?

Kim and Emily showed up half an hour later. I was still sitting on the floor.

"Honey, are you ok?" Emily knelt down and touched my shoulder; I looked up at her and nodded.

"I need to make dinner now. Charlie will be home." Numb I finally got up off the floor and went to the fridge, pulling out ingredients. Kim came over and took my hands, leading me to the table while Emily quickly took over the task of Charlie's supper.

"Why don't you tell us what happened." Kim encouraged.

I shook my head at her and took a breath, "Paul didn't imprint on me."

Kim chuckled, "Of course he did."

I shook my head at her, "He just left."

"Sam said you had a fight. That's all." Emily said moving over to us. "The imprint signals a perfect match not a perfect relationship, it takes work and compromise. Everything is a little fast forwarded which can make the beginning really intense, both the good and the bad. It will all be ok though."

"Yeah Bella, Jared and I fight sometimes too. He's had to run it off a couple times because he freaks out about us fighting and starts to need to phase and then freaks out more which makes him need to phase more."

"Sam and I fought a lot about Leah. I think Jared and now Paul freak out so much because Sam did phase to close to me."

I just nodded and Emily finished cooking while Kim sat chatting with me. After a little bit I even began chatting back but in the back of my mind the thoughts wouldn't go away. If Paul hadn't imprinted on me before, why had he now? Was it real? Was I sure I wanted it to be? Didn't I still love Edward? I knew I did. I also missed the other Cullens.

The girls left as Charlie got home. I left him to eat and went up to my room. I couldn't sleep that night. I'd been given a second chance and I had already fucked it up.

The next day at lunch I moved to the Cullen table.

"Mind if I sit?" I asked them, pointing to the unused chair that wasn't normally there. Alice must have seen my decision to come over.

"Please." Jasper motioned to the chair.

Alice grinned at me and asked, "We can be friends now?"

I laughed at her, "Sure."

"Lauren Mallory thinks you are trying to steal Jasper." She told me with a giggle.

"So why did you sit me next to him then?"

She beamed at me, "To annoy her."

I laughed, "I have no objections."

"None?" Jasper leaned forward putting his hand on the back of my chair and winking at me.

I turned a little in my chair so our eyes met, our faces not far apart. I sent him a smile, "To annoying Lauren or stealing you?" He chuckled and raised an eyebrow. I winked at him and turned back to Alice, speaking to softly for any but a vampire to hear, "So what do you see this afternoon? Edward going to snack on me later?" I whispered.

Emmett's booming laughter rang out over the cafeteria and the few who weren't staring before were now. Jasper sat back chuckling as well, his eyes dancing with amusement. Edward looked like he'd be blushing if he could.

"No. He's to captivated by your silence."

I nodded and grinned at her, "That's good." I turned to Emmett then, "How you been Bear?"

He grinned at me, "Great, it's been a hell of a lot more interesting since you came to town."

When the bell rang I turned back to Alice, "So are you playing angry girl friend and starting cat fight talks or best friend and stirring different kinds of pots?"

She drifted into a vision and then laughed getting up and holding her hand out to me, "I'll walk you to Bio."

I took her hand and got up. We walked arm in arm to class and she hugged me at the door, winking at Jess and Lauren as she went to go to her own class.

I hurried in and sat next to Edward. "So much for blending in." He snorted.

"Did you ever?"

He regarded me carefully, "I suppose not." He asked me a few of the same questions he had the first time around and many new ones. Class flew by.

After gym I saw them by their car and Alice waved me over.

"Hey."

"Want to come over and meet Esme and Carlisle?" Alice asked grinning.

"Sure." I shrugged.

"Are you alright Darlin?" Jasper asked stepping closer to me.

I shrugged and met his golden eyes, "It's been a long day, two."

"You can come and meet our parents another time. Go home and relax." Edward spoke up.

I turned to him, "No. I'm fine. I'd like to see them."

He nodded and Alice took my arm and then Jaspers and the three of us walked over to my truck.

"You want to open the windows Jazz?" I asked, though it was raining and cold.

He sent me a small smile and nod, "Just a crack, you can have my jacket."

He shrugged out of the warm wool and placed it over my shoulders before helping me into the driver's seat and running around to help Alice in and climb in after her.

He cracked the window so my scent would be a smidge less overwhelming though I was pleased to see his golden eyes were still bright.

I drove, without needing to ask for directions, straight to their home. I was surprised to note that Carlisle was home but Alice said he was working over night shifts and didn't start until seven.

The meeting with him and Esme went as smoothly as the first. We sat in the living room and chatted until it was time for me to leave. Jasper walked me out.

"You sure you're ok Darlin?"

I shrugged at him, "Better than yesterday."

He nodded but didn't look convinced, "Did Edward offend you?"

"Edward?"

"You're angry with him, a little distant and angry with all of them, even Esme and Carlisle." He shifted, "Also sensed a little resentment when Ali asked if you could be friends now. Mostly just sadness, overwhelming sadness but also hurt and anger. Most of its directed at Edward, or I think it is."

Was I angry with Edward? I had been to broken to be angry before.

I shrugged, "It's…"

"_Complicated._" He said at the same instant I did.

I laughed and nodded. "Jasper?"

"Yeah Darlin?"

"I love you." He smiled at me, "All of you."

He nodded, his eyes sad despite his smile, "I know."

"I have to go now."

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"I think we would have loved you too."

I smiled at him, "Alice tell you that?"

He shook his head, "She doesn't have solid visions of you. We figured you hadn't made any decisions yet."

"I guess I didn't, I thought I did, I thought…" I swallowed and felt a wave of calm help push back the tears; I met his eyes, "Thank you Jasper."

He nodded, sadness still in his eyes, "Good luck with your werewolf."

"Thanks."

"We're here, you know, if ever."

I shook my head, "I wont change my mind."

He nodded, "See you in school?"

I nodded back at him and then sent him a watery smile, "Tell Ali I loved her, she's my best friend."

He nodded and sent me a wave of affection, sorrow, regret, acceptance and encouragement.

I sent him a last smile and got in my truck to drive home.

I'd finally gotten my goodbye. I went up to bed as soon as I got home and when Charlie arrived I told him I was sick and stayed in bed. I let myself grieve that night and skipped school the next day.


	4. Chapter 4

At three I drove out to La Push and waited outside for Paul to get off school. He was one of the first out and came right over to me.

"Bella?"

"I'm sorry," I told him. "I don't like being told what to do."

He nodded his eyes on the ground. I reached out and touched his arm, "I'll do my best to stay safe and" I took a still slightly painful breath, "I'll stay away from the Cullen's."

He smiled at me, "I just, I loose everything I care about, I don't ever want to loose you. I'm possessive and domineering and angry but I'll try Bella."

I nodded, "Ok."

He pulled me into a hug; "You can't imagine the terror I feel with them near you."

"I'm sorry." I tried to comfort him.

We went back to Emily's to spend time with the pack.

"Bella?" Sam stopped me as I was leaving, Paul had already left to run patrol and I stayed to help Emily with the dinner dishes.

"Sam?"

"Emily said you were upset the other day, I just, wanted to reassure you, about the imprint." I sucked in a breath and met his eyes nodding. "It's real and it's forever. You're his soul mate. You'll be surprised how quickly you will fall in love with him because you were made to love each other. Any disagreements or fights, you'll work through them."

I nodded, "What if…"

"It wasn't a mistake Bella. You complete him. He's already calmer and more balanced. That was the first time he's freaked out since he met you and I know that doesn't seem like a long time but Paul is relatively new still and was the most volatile from day one, he doesn't go more than six hours without something setting him off. Or he didn't, until he looked into your eyes Saturday morning. The fact that he was able to keep as calm as he did long enough to comfort you with the scent of leech coating you is amazing. His instincts were screaming at him to hunt it down and burn it but his imprint came first, you'll always come first."

"So it's real." I reassured myself out loud. He nodded. "It couldn't be a mistake?"

He shook his head, "You are his soul mate."

I nodded and sent him a small smile, "Thanks Sam."

He nodded and I turned to get in my truck. Driving home I decided not to think about the old life I had, the old me, Paul or Cullen's. I'd gotten my goodbye. I'd been able to let them go. I had been to broken to feel the anger at Edward but Jasper was right, it was there. I was hurt and angry with all of them for leaving. I had also been healing. I had been so sure of my fate but when I was faced with the chance to do it all again, I couldn't forgive him, I didn't trust him not to leave me again and while I would miss them, I knew deep within me that as much as I had loved him, loved all of them, it wasn't where I belonged.

The next few weeks I spent more time with Charlie, the Black's and Angela but mostly with the pack. Talk buzzed for a few days about the odd exchange I'd had with the Cullen's but it passed when at the end of the week they left town.

Jasper left a note in my truck; _I am sorry not to have known you better. Your emotions, their purity, strength and beauty have altered me forever. For any reason 360-269-8759 – Jasper_

I cried and hid it away in my desk, knowing I'd never use it but grateful for the connection I'd never had that last time.

After that school was, well, high school. I spent my time with Angela mostly and studying hard. When I fell for Edward it was undeniable and happened so quickly it made my head spin, I was lost to him almost from the moment we met, to the mystery of him, the beauty and then the all consuming love. With Paul, I can't say it happened gradually but it was so natural, such a quiet and almost unnoticeable thing that I didn't really realize I loved him until prom.

He never brought up prom, but he showed up at my house and rang the bell. Charlie told me to wait and went to answer; I thought his excitement was strange. He'd been smiling to himself for an hour now.

"Bella, your prom date is here." I could hear the laughter in his voice.

My heart stopped and I went out of the kitchen to see him standing there in sweat pants and a rare t-shirt. "Paul?"

He grinned at me, "It's Forks Prom."

"I know." I nodded. "I don't dance."

"I know." He laughed and looked me over. "You look perfect."

I glanced down at my almost to tight racer tank and baggy sweats and frowned, I looked like a scrub. I looked back at him and raised an eyebrow. "Thanks?"

He laughed and handed me a stack of movies. They were all prom related horror movies.

I laughed and hugged him. "Emily is making snacks and we helped Sam decorate earlier." He turned to Charlie. "I'm still not sure the plan but I can bring Bella home after work tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" I ask looking from him to Charlie.

"Sam moves in with Emily on Sunday so us guys are getting kicked out at midnight so you, Kim and her can have one last slumber party." He shrugged.

I looked at my dad, "Is that ok?"

Charlie nodded, "It's your prom Bella. Paul called me a week ago to set it all up. I know you aren't into prom but it's a milestone and should be memorable even if you aren't going. Now go, have fun." He smiled at me and shuffled his feet. "I'm off fishing with Billy and Harry in the morning so I'll see you for dinner."

"Thanks Charlie." I kissed his cheek and hurried upstairs to throw an overnight bag together. When I got back down both Charlie and Paul looked a little red.

"Have fun." Charlie repeated before focusing back on the television.

"What was that?" I asked Paul as we climbed into his truck. One not as old or large as mine but that looked twice as beat up. Paul shrugged and I could still see a little red in his copper cheeks. "Paul?" I pushed.

"It's prom. You're spending the night on the reservation."

"SO?"

Paul huffed and glared at me, "He was giving me the sex talk." I burst out laughing and Paul snorted starting the car, "He's a little scary you know." I laughed harder and Paul's face cracked a smile, "At least he didn't take out his shot gun, I'd have a difficult time explaining why I wasn't dead and why I changed into a giant wolf as I ran away."

"It's not like you told him you were going to sleep with me Paul. I'm sure he had no thoughts about the shot gun."

Paul snorted, "He had them and yes I did."

"You told my dad you were going to sleep with me?" I choked.

He shrugged, "He asked."

"If you were going to have sex with me?" I could hear my voice go up an octave.

"What my intentions were."

"And you told him sex?"

He snorted again, "I told him that I had done some dumb shit last year but I was working to be better this year and that you were my whole fucking world so my intentions were to keep you safe and happy and give you everything in my power to be sure you had everything you need or want both now and in the future because I had no intention of ever being dumb enough to lose you."

"Paul." I breathed looking at him as he drove.

We sat in silence for the rest of the drive as I studied his peripheral.

When he finally parked the truck he turned to me, "This is supposed to be a fun night. Why does it feel like I fucked up and you're sad?"

"I'm not sad Paul." He quirked an eyebrow and I laughed.

"Come on then. Prom awaits."

I laughed again and got out of the truck. He led me to the porch and I saw white lights strung up. Inside the main lights were off and a few white twinkle lights and electric candles dimly lit the house, with paper flowers and streamers for decorations. Music was playing and on the coffee table were all our favorite snacks and sodas. Sam, Emily, Jared and Kim were all there, in baggy sweats, the girls in tanks and the boys shirtless as usual.

I laughed as I spun around and hugged Paul, "This is perfect. You did all this for me?"

"We all did." He said with a shrug. I hugged him tighter and sniffled. "Bella?" He rubbed my back as I began to cry. "Babe?" His tone was gentle and worried.

I leaned back and looked at him, sniffling, "It's perfect. You're perfect"

He smiled at me nervously, "I did good then?"

"Yeah." I nodded with a teary smile. "You did." I swallowed. "Thank you."

He leaned down and kissed me, wiping away the few tears that had fallen. I moved to hug the others thanking them as well.

"Come on, this is a party!" Jared said after his hug, making me laugh as he spun me around and lifted me so I didn't have a chance to trip before dropping me onto the worn and comfortable couch.

"Drinks!" Kim exclaimed, pouring us each a soda.

"I'll start the popcorn." Emily grinned dancing into the kitchen.

We chatted for a bit getting situated and then Sam started the first movie. We took a break for more snacks and to just talk before we put in the second. It was the perfect non-prom prom night.

I watched Paul as the movie began and after a minute he turned to look at me as well, "Ok babe?" He whispered.

I nodded and curled into his side, his arm moving to wrap securely around me, "I love you Paul." I sighed and snuggled into his side.

His arm tightened a little and he turned his head, his lips brushing my forehead, "I love you too, always." He whispered back.

I sighed again and breathed him in. We both turned our attention back to the movie and I fell asleep in his lap, the moment passing as casually and easily as all our time together.


	5. Chapter 5

As time had passed I stopped thinking about the past, about the life I had once lived. I remembered the Cullen's with the bittersweet ache of happy memories gone by and loved ones lost.

I flourished wrapped in the love of my angry wolf and surrounded by the support of our pack. Sam was like the big brother I had always wanted, despite the time and stress of being Alpha, he always had time for me, unlike my parents who tended to leave me alone to live my own life, Sam was always checking in on me and asking me to check in with him. He'd sit for hours helping me with math and encouraged me to try new things and not be afraid of looking dumb or falling down. If I were afraid of falling, he was more likely to push me down and say _see you're fine now get up and try._ He was bossy and demanding but supportive. He made me start taking yoga class, which both Emily and Kim consented to try with me. I hated to admit he was right about it improving my balance. He also made me start taking self defense, which he taught me himself, this, while making me look stupid and often sent me home with bruises, both helped my coordination and boosted my confidence. All the pack was good at that. I felt completely safe and taken care of but strong and capable and beautiful.

Jared was the goof ball of us, he always made me laugh even when I was so frustrated I could scream with homework, with Sam kicking my butt in self-defense or whatever it was, he'd say something random that would make me crack up and then relax. He was also the easiest to talk to, he'd just make you relax and then start talking and he had a way of him that made you feel like just getting the words out meant that it would all be ok and even if it wasn't fixed because some things can't be fixed, they were better sharing them with the pack.

Emily, Kim and I became a unit. Emily was in charge of the kitchen, I was in charge of groceries and budgeting and Kim was in charge of organizing. Suddenly everything I had taken care of on my own since I was nine was now shared and for the first time I realized how alone in everything I had felt. I didn't need to take care of everything or be totally taken care of, I wasn't alone but I was strong.

School let out and I spent all summer up at the reservation, I half lived with Sam and Emily, so did Kim. Jared joked that us three girls had imprinted on each other as well since we seemed attached at the hip. Really though he and Paul were there almost as much between patrol and summer jobs.

I worked at Newton Outfitters again. Mike had settled into just being my friend, without ever even hinting at wanting more, after having met Paul. I think he was a little intimidated by his size and the fact that Paul had graduated.

Charlie got along with Paul better than I could have hoped or expected. Jacob didn't, at all. Charlie and I had dinner with the Black's at least once a week and Jacob and I had become friends but Paul stood between us more than Edward had. Jacob couldn't understand why I was with him. He had a reputation for fighting and for toying with girls emotions. In Jake's words, he was a jerk. I'd laugh and shrug it off and tell him I loved Paul. I think it was hard for him because whenever I was at the reservation I was with Paul. Jake had never really had to see me with Edward; he just picked up the pieces. I would be forever grateful to him and I knew one day, if he became a wolf in this parallel universe, he would understand. Maybe he wouldn't though, maybe none of them would. The Cullen's had left.

The summer warmth, I still couldn't bring myself to say heat about any weather in Washington, stretched into September and classes began again. It was long hours spent away from Paul and the pack but I'd hurry to the reservation after school. Paul was usually working still so I'd spend time with Kim and Emily. Sam would help me with Math, Jared would quiz me on chemistry, Paul and I would make-out. We'd all eat together a few times a week but I reserved Sunday nights especially for Charlie and at least two other nights during the week. Those days I'd study with Angela after school before going home to cook. One night would be with the Black's and Jacob, which meant I could still see Paul before heading over.

I was busy all the time and I was always with people but unlike with Edward I could go a day without seeing Paul and not be afraid he wasn't there. I had never known, not happiness because I had been so happy with the Cullen's, but never known peace and contentment along side the happiness like I did now. I was happy with who I was and what my life was. There was nothing I wanted to change. Everything was… exactly as it was supposed to be. I'd found fate's plan.

I'd just forgotten one thing.

Paul didn't imprint on me in my world. I'd never forgotten that really but had let it slide into the realm of unimportant. This Paul, my Paul, had. It was all that mattered. Except it wasn't.

Without the Cullen's here, the only thing I knew about vampires in the area came from the wolves. They had told me they'd hunted some nomads last spring but they'd gotten away. I knew it had to have been Victoria, James and Laurent but with no Cullen's there had been no baseball, and no me for James to hunt. They had simply moved on. There had been a few other nomads, quickly dispatched but mostly the summer and autumn were quiet.

Then came the day, only a few from Halloween, when I found Jared leaning nonchalantly against my truck.

"What's up Jay?" I smiled at him as I tossed my bag in the cab.

"Leech on the res."

"Everything ok? Everyone?" My thoughts ran straight to Paul as my heart screamed I'd know if something had happened to him. What about the others though?

"Same fuckers were here last spring. We chased them pretty far north and lost them in the ocean."

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked quietly my heart clenching painfully.

"He's going to be ok."

"Jared." My eyes bored into his.

He straightened and nodded slightly, to say ok. "There was a new one with them, young, crazy. Instead of running she turned on us, charged. Paul knocked Sam out of the way."

"Paul." My chest felt tight. Too tight, it was hard to breath.

"He's fine." I nodded. "I promise Bella. It's a couple broken bones. It will heal in a few days."

"Where is he?"

"Sam and Emily's. I told him I'd come get you." I nodded and moved to get in my truck but he stopped me, "Let me drive ok." I was about to protest but realized how badly I was shaking and simply handed him the keys.

"Jared?" I asked quietly, my heart still squeezing into a tight and painful ball.

"Yeah." He didn't look away from the road.

"How bad is it really?"

He shrugged. "He'll be fine."

"Jared?"

"We heal fast Bella."

"Jared, please."

He looked at me and sighed, "It's not good."

I nodded, "How not good?"

"He's healing but she crushed a lot of bones, Sam's afraid they aren't healing properly and we can't exactly take him to a doctor to set them right." I nodded. "He might not walk again if they don't." He added quietly.

I felt tears burning my eyes but just nodded again. "Take me home first."

"Bella?"

"Please."

I picked up my phone as it rang, "Charlie?"

"Sorry Darlin, just me."

"Jasper?"

"Alice said you were going to call."

I nodded, tears stinging my eyes; I turned to Jared again, "Never mind, just get me to Paul." He nodded, his jaw tight, he knew exactly who I was talking to. "Jazz?"

"Still here Darlin."

"I need Carlisle." My voice was high with stress, pain and fear.

"You hurt?" I could hear the worry.

"Paul is. My werewolf. We can't take him to a hospital but he needs to have some broken bones set. Fast."

"He heard, he's on his way. I'll be… Ali and I will be right behind him. Give us three hours."

I jumped out of the cab before Jared had stopped and ran to find Paul. He looked like he'd been hit by a semi.

"Paul?" I cried and ran to him.

"M'ok baby." He pushed out.

I sobbed over him and clutched his hand. "Paul."

"She called Cullen." Jared said as he followed me in.

"He's going to fix you Paul. Please, trust me. He'll make it better. I can't loose you. Please."

Two and a half hours later, Sam and Jared escorted three vampires to the house, Jasper's gift reaching out to keep everyone calm. Alice wrapped me in a hug. "It'll be ok."

"You can't see them." I sniffled.

She laughed, "No but I know Carlisle and Jasper. Come on outside now and let's let them work."

I shook my head, "I have to stay with him."

"Darlin." Jasper was instantly standing in front of me, "I'll make who did this pay, I promise but now Carlisle needs to help him. To do that we have to re-break a lot of bones and you don't want to be here for that."

"Jasper." I looked from him to Paul, who was still in so much pain.

"Look at me Darlin." Jasper flooded me with more comfort. "I need you to trust me. I ain't never done nothing to earn it but I promise you, Carlisle will do everything he can for your mate and I'm goin to help him. You bein here with us is a distraction to him. It's got him real worried. The wolves can't leave us alone with him so one of em'll go with you and the other two and wait. Please, trust me, trust Carlisle."

I nodded, eyes still burning with tears, "I do. I trust you Jazz."

"I know. I still don't know why but Darlin I promise I will earn the faith you have in us and give reason for the love you send whenever you look at us."

I nodded and Alice wrapped an arm gently around my shoulders, "Come on Bella. I've always wanted to see first beach."

I let her lead me outside and heard Sam telling Jared to follow us. It was a testament to the pack's trust in me and they're love for Paul that the Cullen's had been able to come here.

I could hear Paul screaming as we moved through the trees. Emily had stayed to help how she could but Kim walked up and took my other hand, squeezing it with tears in her own eyes, knowing how easily it could have been Jared.

I could hear Paul's screams echoing down the beach and without Jaspers influence I felt waves of fear and pain crashing into me.

It was hours before Jacob came running up the beach to tell me Billy had sent for us. We went to his house and Billy was on the porch waiting he looked grim but nodded at Alice before focusing on me.

"Sam called. Said you better head on up and see Paul now."

"Everything ok?" Jacob asked frowning.

"Paul Meraz was in an accident. He's fine. Like to be up in a day or two. Staying with Sam and Emily until he's on his feet again. I've called Charlie to dinner and will let him know you'll be staying the night with Emily."

I nodded, "Thanks Billy."

He nodded to us and nodded to Alice, "We're grateful you came."

"Any time. Bella has my husbands number."

"Husband?" Jacob asked frowning, "Aren't you still in high school."

Alice smiled at him and covered her tracks smoothly, "Just out but I know he's my forever."

"Right." Jacob blushed looking away.

"Come on Bella."

I nodded, "Thanks Billy."

I hurried towards the road, towards Paul.

"I can take Bella if you take your mate. It will be faster." Alice told Jared as we moved out of hearing distance.

Jared looked to me and I could finally see the worry in him was almost on par with mine. He and Paul had always been brothers. I nodded and he began moving for the tree line to phase. When Kim was settled on his back Alice lifted me on hers and the two ran through the woods getting us there in less than a minute. As soon as Alice set me down I ran into the house.

"Paul." I dropped to my knees but turned to Carlisle. "He's ok? He'll be ok now?"

Carlisle nodded, "I've given him a lot of morphine. He burns it off so quickly it was a guessing game how much to use to help him and not hurt him but it should all wear off soon. He's healing quickly but I'd guess it will take a day or two before he's good as new."

"Thank you." I breathed, clutching Paul's hand. I felt the tears finally come as I turned back to Paul and buried my head against his arm. I sobbed out all the fear and relief. I must have fallen asleep after crying myself out because I woke to Sam lifting me.

Paul growled in his sleep and Sam shifted me to lay beside him before covering me with a blanket. I tried to sit up. "I don't want to hurt him." I whispered.

"You wont and you'll both rest easier together. He's healing Bella."

Carlisle was allowed back to check on Paul twice and on the second day he was pronounced healed but warned to take it easy another day or two. I hugged Carlisle and Paul only growled reflexively a little.

Jasper and Alice came over to my house later that night to say goodbye. I felt tears sting my eyes as I hugged them.

"Jazz…"

He smiled at me and I felt a wave of affection and calm, "For any reason."

I smiled at him and nodded, recognizing the words from the note with his phone number, "Be happy." I told them both.

Alice hugged me and Jasper took her hand, they were gone in a blink.

I found out later that in the two days Paul had been healing Jasper helped Sam and Jared tear apart the bitch newborn that had hurt Paul.

I was grateful to him; in his silent way Jasper had always been there for me, even in the life before this. He'd given comfort and affection though my presence had never been easy for him and we'd spent little time in each others company there had always been a bond. I'd thought it was just because of Alice but this Jasper gave me pause to think that maybe, without my realizing it we'd bonded through the sharing of our emotions because despite that we'd spoke little, he had shared his emotions with me, amusement, concern, affection, comfort. I was only sorry we'd never get the chance to be part of each others lives, even if it was mostly through his wife, Alice, I still missed her. I had new friends; a family, my pack but a small place in my heart would always be theirs.

My thoughts, which had begun with gratitude and a bittersweet ache of love for the Cullen's turned to worry over vampires, over Paul, I knew he was ok, this time, what about next? What if Carlisle wasn't as close? What if it was a bite?


	6. Chapter 6

Winter set in and with it a cold that only dissipated when I was with Paul.

"I love you." I murmured, leaning against Paul as Emily finished cooking.

He leaned down to kiss me, his arms hugging me tightly, "I love you." He whispered back.

"Can we go for a walk?"

Paul nodded and led me outside, it was rare I fought food for his affections and was happy that I'd won without a fight, sometimes I wondered if a wolves first imprint wasn't his stomach.

He held my hand as we walked through the light dusting of snow. "What's wrong baby?"

"Nothing." I shook my head, looking back to smile at him. Bad idea, I might be a little less vertically challenged since I started yoga and self defense but ice was still my sworn enemy.

Paul caught me as I fell but my weight pushed him on the ice and we both went down laughing.

"I love you." I told him again.

"Bell?" He sat up, bundling me in my arms, "You keep saying that like I need the reminder, like I won't see you for a while. It's scaring me." He admitted, his voice quiet and he breathed in my scent as though to prove I was there in his arms.

I shook my head, "I almost lost you." I reminded him.

"I'm fine." He pulled me tighter into his arms, "That was almost a month ago. I'm all healed. Not even a scar or ache with bad weather. Doctor Leech fixed me up good as new."

I nodded into his chest, a few tears escaping. How could I lose him now? What if his real imprint came along? That was the nightmare I'd had since he'd healed. I'd forgotten about the past, I'd let go of Edward, the Cullen's and my old self. This had become my world, my everything but in my world, Paul never imprinted on me, Paul hated me. I'd rather he imprint on someone else and be living because the thought of being in a world without Paul hurt to much to even begin to comprehend but either way, I'd lose him. I'd be alone and so cold forever.

"Bella?" He pulled me a little away from his body, "What' going on baby?"

I shook my head at him and sniffled, then shrugged, "Hormones?" I suggested with a shrug.

Paul laughed and pulled me into his arms, "Damn, I love you."

I laughed and hugged him too. "I'm sorry I've been so clingy this month."

He shrugged, "I've been worse since the first time we met." No he hadn't, he'd hated me the first time we met. I nodded my head but felt fresh tears. His smile fell as he wiped them away. "Please talk to me Bell." He asked softly.

"It's ok, I'm ok." I forced a smile, "Let's get you lunch before Jared eats it all."

"Please Bell." His worried eyes met mine imploringly.

I leaned into him and kissed him, he kissed me back, Paul was always free with affection towards me, though I was still a virgin. I pulled back and smiled at him, "I'm not going anywhere. I promise. I just," I swallowed as I felt a lump in my throat, "I've never been so scared." Tears burned my eyes, "I keep having nightmares that I loose you."

His thumb brushed across my cheek as he held my face between his hot hands, "You aren't going to loose me Bell. I'm right here. I'll always be with you, I am always with you, half of my soul tied to yours in this life and the next."

I nodded and kissed him again, "I love you." I told him again curling into his heat.

He just sat holding me a while, his hand rubbing soothing circles on my back. Sam came and found us a little later, checking we were ok so we went back to the house to eat a now very late lunch.

That night, Paul was at my window, to chase away my nightmares. He held me all night and when I fell asleep I didn't dream.

For three nights Paul slept, peacefully beside me, but I noticed in the days that followed, each night he seemed to be more tense as I lay down beside him, snuggling into his heat to sleep.

"What is it Paul?" I finally asked, sitting cross-legged on the bed facing him.

"I can't stay tonight."

I frowned at him, "Why? Do you have patrol? Charlie's working so you can just let yourself in after."

He shook his head, "No, no patrol, this just has to stop, I can't stay Bell."

Tears burned my tears, "Stop?"

"Bell." He sighed running a hand through his cropped hair.

No, I wouldn't let him break me, not like Edward once had. "Fine. Leave." I spat.

"Bell, please."

"Please what?" I demanded. "Understand? Let me guess, it was a mistake and you didn't know?"

"Bell?" He seemed confused but I wasn't about to listen to him tell me he was sorry to hurt me but I wasn't his imprint.

"Just go! Get out! Go!" I shoved his shoulder. He was shaking lightly, so was I, shaking with the pain rippling through my body like a live current. "Leave!" I screeched at him again.

Shaking he got up and disappeared out the window.

Pain ripped through me in waves "Argghhhhhhhhh!" I screamed out the anger and anguish. Then slid off the bed to sit elbows on knees, tears burning tracks down my cheeks. I sat there crying until I heard the front door bang open.

"Bella!" Sam yelled from downstairs, I heard him running up and my bedroom door crash open, Emily and Kim at his heals. "What happened?" He demanded striding into the room towards me, and kneeling so we were eye level.

I blinked to clear my vision sending one last tear down my red face, "Get out!" I demanded coolly, my voice no more than a whisper but clear and steady. "Get out of my house."

"Bella."

I just glared at him and Emily set her hand on his shoulder. "Go Sam. Go find Paul. We're ok here."

He looked back at me and for a second it looked like he was going to reach out to brush the tears from my eyes but he pulled his hand back, stood and strode out of the room.

"Bella?" Kim asked stepping forward.

I looked at them and felt fresh waves of tears crash over me, "It's over."

"What is?" Kim asked gently.

"Paul." I choked out, "He didn't imprint on me."

"What?" Emily asked confused.

Kim frowned, "Of course he did."

I shook my head and looked up at them again, "He came to break up with me tonight."

"What are you talking about?" Emily asked calmly, "Paul loves you Bella."

"Did he say that?" Kim asked, "Did he say he was here to break up with you?"

I shook my head, "I've felt it all week, every day he pulls away more and tonight, tonight" fresh tears fell, "He left me."

"What did he say?" Emily asked gently.

I shook my head, "Nothing. I don't want to hear it." I was angry again, "I'm not good enough, not the right one, I get it. It was a mistake. I don't need to hear him tell me I was just a distraction!"

Kim started laughing, Emily and I both turned to her in surprise, "Kim?" Emily exclaimed.

"He's tired." She told us, her laughter stopping but her grin still wide, "He's not pushing you away Bella, he's pushing himself away."

"What?" It didn't sound like there was a difference.

"He's been napping at Jared's house because he stays awake half the night trying not to jump you." She giggled. "He told Jay he's had blue balls for a week and was worried they were going to fall off soon."

"He?" I frowned at her and then laughed, "He wasn't leaving me?"

She shook her head, her expression more serious, "Never Bella. He loves you."

"You're his imprint Bella. That's permanent, bonded forever."

"No refunds." Kim added making us all laugh again. Jared was really rubbing off on her. She was still shy in public but when it was just the pack she was really funny.

I wiped away the tears and sniffled, "I'm still his imprint." It was half question and half affirmation.

"Always and forever." Emily assured me.

"Until death do you part." Kim agreed.

I smiled at them and then froze, "Oh shit."

"What?" Emily asked looking worried again.

"I just totally flipped at Paul."

"We know." They nodded with chuckles.

"How did you get here so fast?"

"Wolf." They shrugged. "Paul's howling let the boys know something was wrong and through him they heard you scream."

I shuddered at the memory of electric ice-cold pain racing through my veins.

"Is he ok?"

They looked at each other and back at me, "Maybe we should go get him." Emily suggested.

With that I was up and hurrying with them down the stairs and outside.

"Paul!" I shouted into the woods.

"Paul!" Kim echoed, "Jared!"

"Sam!" Emily also yelled into the trees.

All three wolves moved to the edge of the woods. "Come over tomorrow." Emily told me moving to hug me before walking over to the large black wolf.

"Talk tomorrow." Kim said hugging me and winking before moving to the Jared wolf.

I smiled weakly at Paul, "I'm sorry." I whispered. He moved slowly forward and lay down. I figured he might still be having trouble phasing or was worried he might get upset and phase again, so I sat cross-legged facing him. "I know I've been a mess this month, I just, I don't even know what to say." I sighed, "I thought you were breaking up with me." I blushed looking down at my fingers, "You've been, I don't even know how to describe it, distant, I guess, and I thought maybe, I was scared you didn't really imprint on me and were leaving me." I looked up and saw a human Paul walking over to me to crouch in front of me.

He cupped my face in his hands and drew my eyes to his, "You are my imprint, half of my soul is yours and half of yours is mine. More than that Bella, I love you. I'm not going to leave you. Not ever. I am always with you. This is forever. How do I make you believe me?"

"Love me." I told him, our eyes still holding steady.

"I do. More than anyone or anything."

I shook my head, as much as I could with his hands still cupping my face, holding my eyes on his. "Make love to me." I asked him.

He didn't say anything, just kissed me with a deep and bruising intensity that gentled after a moment, becoming slow and sweet and heart achingly tender. His hand moved from my face to my waist and he lifted me in his arms and carried me in the house and up the stairs.

He laid me gently on the bed and removed the little shorts and tank I always slept in, placing kisses randomly as he did. I ran my hands over every inch of skin I could. I had seen him phase so I knew even his naked body. It was the first he was getting to see or touch mine and he was relishing the moment, worshipping every part of me.

Finally he settled over me, "Forever." He whispered the one word and then sank slowly into me.

I was panting heavily and embarrassingly wet but it still burned as he stretched me. He gently pushed in and I was relieved when he finally stopped. It hurt, I was stretched and full but it was manageable.

He kissed me and I felt him pull out a little and then his eyes met mine, "Mine." He half growled before pushing forward in a short hard thrust breaking my barrier. It hurt, a lot. He remained still as I adjusted to him only moving when he felt me relax. He pulled out an inch and then slowly tunneled back inside of me, I gasped as he moved further inside of me than the last time before slowly pulling out an inch, again he pushed forward two inches, my body stretching around him. I was panting as each time he pulled out he pushed further inside of me. I knew he was big, I'd seen him for shits sake but inside me he felt even larger and thick, so thick. Finally his hips lay flush with mine. We were both sweating and panting heavily. He lay still until I moaned his name and rocked against him, my body aching for more as the stretching burn dissipated.

He started to make love to me slowly but our speed picked up quickly, my nails digging into his back as I urged him faster. I could feel myself so close to the edge when he growled and his hips snapped hard into me. I felt a warm burst of him inside me and gasped. He growled again and kissed me. I could feel the edge and as a second shudder ran through him he pinched my clit making me come, hard. He was still moving just a little within me, extending my orgasm and I could feel him still coming in infrequent spurts.

I sighed and kissed his neck. "Always." I whispered, half statement and half question.

"Forever." He whispered back.


	7. Chapter 7

November passed into December and then the New Year, Valentine's Day, which like prom ended up being Emily's group decorated living room, in hearts and flowers, and horror movies with lots of chocolate. Embry phased, surprising all the wolves, he wasn't a direct descendant, at least not that they were aware of and though a few nomads had passed through, the Cullen's were gone and the vampire presence was low.

We welcomed him into the pack though I grieved for Jacob missing his friend. It wasn't terribly long before we discovered vampires had settled a little north of us. They were yellow-eyed, Laurent and Irina. They were extended the courtesy of the Cullen Treaty and warned; one bite and the wolves would kill them. We hoped Embry was the last, they weren't as close as the Cullen's had been but I knew somehow he wouldn't be, the wolves knew deep down as well and were watching Jake and Quil like hawks. Finally came March and the one-year anniversary of the day Paul imprinted on me. It had been the best year of my life, despite a few bumps on the road and I was finally relaxed in the imprint, convinced this was my fate and it was now set, as it was supposed to be, unchangeable and unbreakable. Jake phased in early March and Quil quickly followed. I was beyond happy to have Jake back in my life, for more than a weekly family dinner, but I wasn't the same Bella who'd been best friends with him, we didn't share all that history of him healing me. He was still my Jacob but I wasn't his Bells. To him I was Bella, Paul's Bell and he still didn't care overly much for Paul. They were brothers but not great friends. I loved him, would always love him but my life was full with Angela and a few school friends outside the pack and Emily, Kim, Sam and Jared in it. The six of us had built a special bond over the year and while our family grew we also held on to the tight friendships we'd built.

It was the first week of May when the next curve ball hit us. Leah and Seth phased. I was less surprised than the others, Leah having phased for me once before. Things in the pack were tense and there were fresh vampire scents in the area making everyone tense.

The vampires' scents were James and Victoria, up North visiting Laurent. I knew this because Sam told us our Resident Northern Vamps had company and we should be extra careful until they left. I knew who it was because James and Victoria didn't give a flying fuck about treaties. James loved a challenge and werewolves were a new challenge. I begged Paul to be careful, to not trust them, to never go out on patrol alone. Every night I had nightmares about Paul being hurt, about Carlisle not getting her fast enough this time. It wasn't Paul they found though. It wasn't the wolves James came after.

He found Kim and I on First Beach. I grabbed her hand and lifted my chin at him, faking a bravery I didn't feel. "Hello James." He looked surprised for a moment, then he smiled, "Well, well, aren't you an interesting thing. Not going to beg?"

I shook my head, "Not for me."

"For who then?"

"Kim." I met his red eyes, "Let her leave." No way was he getting any of my family, not if I could help it.

"Why would I do that?"

I had to think fast, he could just as easily kill us both. "What fun would it be to kill us so easily." I told him with a nonchalant shrug, I knew I couldn't hide the fear but I thought I pulled it off pretty well, "She'll alert the wolves, make things more interesting for you."

He smirked, "You are an interesting thing."

I shrugged, "I'm weird, I know."

He smirked at me and then nodded before turning to Kim, "Run along now little wolf girl, I'll play my little pets game for now." He laughed as he scooped me up and ran with me.

Victoria caught up with us a little ways away, "James?" She questioned.

He just smirked at her and shook his head. We were deep in the woods, and rather high in the mountains when he set me down.

"What shall we do with you now pet?" He asked me, wrapping an arm around Victoria.

"Not feeling to peckish just now I take it?" I wasn't sure where the flippancy came from, I was so afraid I thought I might pee.

He laughed at my attitude while my heart tried to beat through my chest.

"Oh you do smell divine but I rather like you."

I snorted, "Gee thanks." James liked me, somehow I doubted it meant he'd let me be off on my merry way, back to Paul and our pack.

"I think I'll keep you." Then he grinned, "See how the wolves react to one of their precious mates draining their people dry." He and Victoria laughed while I backed away, a new kind of terror filling me. I didn't want to be a vampire, not in this world. I prayed Paul was coming, I knew he'd come for me, I just needed to stall, of course my stalling at the beach had gotten me kidnapped so I was a little concerned at how good I might be at this.

"Nothing to say?" Victoria taunted.

I shook my head, unable to form words or thoughts beyond the image of my Paul, smiling at me and then his face turning into the Paul from the other world, full of hatred as he explodes into a wolf like he had when I'd slapped him, only this time he was really ready to kill me, because I was like them, a vampire.

The world began to swim and I felt darkness claw at my vision, James was petting my hair, "You are a very interesting little thing pet." He purred. I felt him lift my wrist and noticed Victoria seemed edgy, please let it be the wolves.

He kissed my palm and then ran his nose back up to my wrist, placing another kiss there before biting.

I dropped to my knees as fire licked up my veins. I refused to scream. I felt his cold finger wipe away a tear I hadn't known fell and then he was ripped from me.

I watched almost numb as Emmett, my brother Bear grabbed Victoria and Rosalie ripped her head off. Jasper had already removed James's and Alice was tearing him apart.

I met his sad eyes, "I'm here Darlin, I'll take care of you."

I shook my head, "Suck it out." I begged.

He looked stricken, "I… Bella," He shook his head, "I don't have that kind of…"

"You do, Jazz, please." I sent him all the brotherly love and faith I had in him.

He dropped to his knees and pulled my wrist to his mouth, "If I die," I whispered, my voice a pained and high pant, "It's ok."

"Bella." His eyes were black.

"Try." The word became a scream of pain and then his mouth was on my wrist. I tried to focus on how much I loved him and Alice, how much their family had meant to me but the fire was so painful it was all consuming. I felt a cold hand grasping my other hand and dimly noted that it was Rosalie, that should have confused me but I just gripped her hand as the pain ripped through me.

I focused back on Jasper and Alice appeared at his back, "Stop Jazz."

I felt blackness pulling at the edges of my vision but as I closed my eyes I saw Paul's face, I hated what my death would do to him but I knew, in that moment, I was grateful to Jasper for trying and hated just as much what he would suffer from it, what he must have suffered after trying to bite me at my birthday and not for the first time I felt overwhelming love, respect and sorrow for him. In that moment, I knew, he was the best of all of them and I wished I'd told him what he'd told me, he was worth it too.


	8. Chapter 8

I blinked awake and found myself looking up at Carlisle's calm, serene smile. "Welcome back Miss Swan."

"Carlisle." I breathed. I blinked as tears swam in my vision, "I'm alive." I choked out and then I started to laugh. I was alive.

He helped me to sit up, unlike the last time James left that scar on my wrist, I didn't have any other damages so while I felt weak, I felt elated and wonderful and alive. Carlisle monitored me for a couple more hours while I sat and talked with the family, all the while bouncing emotions to Jasper while leaning against Alice and holding Rosalie's hand. Every once in a while I couldn't help but grin and breath out, "I'm alive."

Rosalie would squeeze my hand, Jasper would shoot me happiness, relief and brotherly love while Alice giggled and sent him a look of absolute adoration.

Alice explained the vision she'd had of James attacking me. I thanked all that was holy they'd been on their way to Alaska and not very far away when it had happened. I owed her and Jasper my life. I owed them my everything.

Finally I was pronounced healthy and Alice offered to drive me the couple hours it would take to get home. I thanked all of them, hugging them and then tripping as I hurried to the car.

Jasper was keeping me calm as I was bouncing in my seat to get home. I flew out of the car at the border and into Sam's arms; he gripped me tightly to his body and nodded at Jasper and Alice.

"You're alive." He breathed, his arms tightening to just before painful.

"I'm alive." I laughed and sobbed, hugging him back. "Where's Paul?" I demanded as he carried me towards the tree line. "Sam?" I knew then something was wrong, terribly wrong. Paul should have been at the border to meet me.

Many of the wolves were watching me in the woods; I didn't see Jared or Paul anywhere. "Sam!" I could hear the hysteric tone of my own voice.

"He's fine." Sam assured me instantly pulling me back into his arms. "It's you we were afraid for."

"Where is he?"

"Home, waiting for you." I nodded and he lifted me onto his broad back and began jogging through the woods to his and Emily's house.

"BELLA!" Jared was off the porch in a heartbeat, swinging me into his arms.

"BELLA!" Emily and Kim, both who'd been recently crying came running off the porch after him.

"You saved her." Jared hugged me into his body, almost painfully tight "You foolish, beautiful, wonderful, amazing, crazy woman."

"I'm ok Jay."

"Don't you ever do that again." Kim was crying as she pulled me into her arms, hugging me tightly.

"Ever!" Emily agreed joining our sisterly hugs.

We were laughing and crying and hugging but I kept looking for Paul.

It was then I saw him, a giant silver wolf watching me from the tree line.

"Paul." I breathed out his name and took a couple wobbly steps to him. All the fear I'd felt from the moment I'd seen James came crashing down on me, all the relief that I was still alive. I dropped to my knees and sobbed, my eyes meeting his "Paul."

Finally, as though my eyes meeting his again, broke a spell, he was human and pulling me into his arms, his body shaking as he held me to him.

Paul wouldn't let me out of his sight after that, he wouldn't let me out of arms reach but I was ok with that, I didn't want to be anywhere I couldn't see or touch him either. We lay curled in the bed of Sam and Emily's guest room, I was listening to his heart beating under my ear and how perfectly the beat matched mine and thinking how beautiful it was when he finally spoke.

"I felt you dying."

"I'm ok." I reminded him, kissing his chest.

"I felt you die." His body shuddered and he held me tighter. Neither of us slept much that night.

In the morning I understood what he meant, we were saying goodbye so I could go see Charlie and he was looking into my eyes as though searching for something.

"Paul?"

"I felt…"

I shook my head, "I'm ok." I reached up and touched his jaw.

"I love you." He reminded me.

"I love you too." Something was wrong, I'd pushed it back after he'd pulled me into his arms but something was wrong. I felt tears sting my eyes, "Paul?"

He was gazing into my eyes again, searching, "It's broken." He breathed.

My heart clenched into a fist and went still. "Paul."

He shook his head, "I love you. It doesn't matter."

"Paul." I couldn't breath.

"He shook his head and pulled me into his arms, they closed around me tighter than the night before. "It doesn't matter, I love you, you're my imprint, my soul mate."

"It's broken." I breathed out.

"It doesn't matter." He repeated. Then he pushed me back, just enough to look me in the eyes and still holding me tightly, "I'll fix it Babe and even if the bond is…" he shook his head growling, "It doesn't matter. I love you and you love me. We're soul mates."

My head was swimming, the imprint was broken, I cried and clung to him.

"I love you." He said again, more fiercely.

I didn't end up getting home that day, or that night. A meeting was called with all the Elders, everyone was shocked, I clung to Paul, terrified he wouldn't want me anymore, he clung to me too as though if he didn't see me, I'd disappear, our severed bond telling him I was lost to him, at least in part.

"There has to be a way to fix it." Leah insisted, shocking everyone, Leah wasn't exactly fond of imprinting. She snorted and then tears blurred her eyes as she looked at Emily, "I'd never wish," she waved at me and Paul, "_that_ on you." She sighed and then glared at me, "Had to get yourself bitten by a damn leech."

Paul just growled at her and pulled me tighter into his arms, "Alive, you're alive." It was becoming a mantra for us both, that, and each others names. I could feel the part of me where he was supposed to be, searching for him, the tie binding us had been cut but our souls were still part of each other.

"Its bullshit anyways." Jacob protested, "More supernatural voodoo stealing our lives and choices, now she, they are free."

I felt tears sting my eyes and hid in Paul's chest as he growled at Jake.

"Do you feel that way?" I asked him shakily in a whisper, not caring the others could hear but afraid of his answer.

"No." His answer was instant and sharp, his arms hugging me tighter to him. "You're mine. My soul mate." His head dropped to rest over mine as he breathed in my scent, his next three words were softer and full of pain, "I love you."

"I love you." I whispered back, knowing imprint or not, I truly loved this man, he was imperfect and wounded and beautiful in his own unique way and he made me feel beautiful, cherished and strong. He made me feel loved and worthy of his love.

I slept fitfully that night and Paul barely slept, even in his sleep, he was afraid of not being able to see me, of my disappearing now that he couldn't feel me through the bond. It made me ache for him.


	9. Chapter 9

The next morning we had no choice, if I didn't go home, if I didn't go to school, Charlie was going to freak out.

Paul drove me to school, it was a nightmare, I was a mess. Thankfully they all thought I was still sick, the excuse Emily had used to cover for me, the nurse sent me home at lunch and I called Charlie to tell him. He came home quickly to check on me, leaving soup and telling me to rest more. I was beyond shocked later that night when he suggested I go back to stay with Emily until I registered that he had some big fishing thing with Billy. He seemed unsure if he should stay with me since I was so ill but I assured him I'd be better off with Emily anyways and he readily agreed, telling me Sam would pick me up in the morning.

I slept even worse that night, what little sleep I got punctured with dreams of Paul's smiling, love filled face shifting to one full of hate.

Sam arrived early and lifted me, blanket and all, from the bed, depositing me in his truck and then disappearing into the house again only to return with a small duffle, which he tossed in the bed of the truck.

I leaned against the window, drifting in and out of nightmares as he drove the twenty-minutes to La Push. Paul looked as bad as I felt. He pulled me out of the truck into a crushing embrace.

"I love you." We both whispered, mine quiet and afraid, his an almost angry growl.

Billy had arranged for a five-day fishing trip for him and Charlie giving the pack, giving Paul and I, time to adjust, to hopefully find a solution. It was hard to go without touching each other and Paul couldn't stand for me to be out of his sight. The only time I felt whole, complete and unafraid was when he was inside of me or for those few minutes after, when our breathing and heartbeats were just beginning to even out again. Paul alternated between being so gentle it was almost reverent and angry possessive almost rough with desperation. We matched each other in our pain and more than ever before I knew, for as much as I loved him, heart, body and soul, Paul had loved me the same and imprint or no he still did, our love was the most real thing in this world and I wouldn't lose him because Paul would fight tooth and nail, to the death, to be with me. Jacob was right in a way, we were free from the imprint, we knew no amount of voodoo was making us love each other, we just loved each other and all our imperfections that made us so right, even if it was hard for others to see why.

When Billy and Charlie got back, Paul and I were attempting to settle into our non-imprinted relationship, which oddly made us both a little more clingy as we couldn't feel each other through the bond anymore, the broken pieces of our souls still searching for each other, making him angry and me desperate and afraid at times. Paul and I still slept fitfully but the horror of the break was slowly receding. He was still my Paul and I was still his. We'd be ok in time. I knew we'd work it out somehow though because even if we couldn't fix the imprint, we were still soul mates.

Sometimes it felt like I was having a panic attack, and I just had to see him, to make sure he still loved me, still wanted me. Paul though, was worse. He had to check I was still there, still ok, that I still wanted him. He would drive me to and from school and when he kissed me its like he was trying to sear a mark on my soul, to brand my heart with his name. It already was, but he couldn't feel it anymore, so everytime I saw him, we reminded each other. I was alive. We were in love. Nothing was coming between us.

Weeks continued to pass and Paul's fuse was shorter than before I'd met him, before the imprint had calmed him. He fought with his brothers and watched over me almost obsessively, afraid if he couldn't see me, I'd disappear. The elders couldn't find anything about a broken imprint anywhere. Everything they knew said an imprint couldn't be broken, but here we were, the living proof of the tragedy. Sam swore they'd find a way, they'd fix it, he even called Carlisle. If the wolves had no answers, maybe the vampires would, after all, the vampires were the reason they phased and the reason the imprint broke.

Carlisle promised he'd do everything he could to find answers and the family returned to Forks immediately. I was happy to see Jasper and Alice. Even Rosalie. Something about my fighting so hard to be with Paul seemed to resonate with her in a way it hadn't when I'd loved her brother. Maybe it was that I fought so hard to live, that I would rather risk death than give up and face an eternity as Paul's enemy.

After two months, Paul and I were slightly less panicked about the imprint. I was still sad and scared he'd stop loving me, I knew it was impossible, that our love was real but sometimes that absence of that bond would tear through me and the only thing that could make it better was seeing him, touching him. Paul, he was angry, it was worse than before me, he felt like the world had taken something from him, life had already taken so much from him, his imprint was asking to much. He tolerated Jasper and Alice in my life, even letting them spend time with me alone. He hated to even leave me alone at school in Forks, afraid something would take me from him, but he trusted them to take care of me in a way he trusted the pack, the only ones he trusted more being Jared and Sam. He even begrudgingly liked Rosalie and Emmett and he respected Carlisle. A truce had been called between the Cullen's and the tribe a long time before, but this was more than a truce, they had become allies of a sort, working together to protect me and heal what had been broken, what should never have been possible to break.

It was graduation and the pack was having a bonfire to celebrate. Paul had already talked to Charlie and we were moving in together in only a few days. Soon, we wouldn't have to say goodbye, for long stretches of time for me to be at school or even as a pretense for Charlie at night.

Everyone was having a good time, laughing and eating. Paul was calm, he was always calmer when we were actually touching, until we overheard a conversation between some of the younger wolves. Jake said something about imprinting, not wanting the choice taken from him. Paul snapped.

It was a touchy subject and he had a very short fuse still. They were fighting and I felt irrationally afraid again, unable to breath so I moved away towards the cliff, Sam would pull them apart and Paul would come for me, already it was a routine for us, him broken and angry, me just broken. Slowly I knew we were healing, that we would be ok but it would still take some time.

The howl that went up as I stared out at the moon a few minutes later, terrified me, that was not a wolves feuding howl, it was a leech on the res howl. I shivered and spun around, slipping on a rock I lost my balance and tumbled backwards, the top of my thighs hit the edge of the cliff hard, my arms flailing backwards met only air and then I was tumbling, banging into the rocks along the cliff my body bounced off one boulder, pushing me away from the cliff face enough to avoid landing on the rocks below as I plunged into the cold, dark water below.


	10. Chapter 10

I was coughing up water as Jake looked at me with concern, "Bella?"

"Jake?" my throat felt raw and sore. I looked around. "Paul?"

"Bella?" Concern had been replaced with confusion.

"Where's Paul?"

Jake shook his head frowning at me, "I don't know. Sam's." He sighed, "Are you ok Bella? Geeze, we should get you in some dry clothes." He took me back to his house and I was confused.

"Why are we here?"

He gave me that confused, concerned look, "So you can get dry."

"Why not home?" I meant Sam and Emily's, I'd been calling it home for a while but Jake seemed confused again.

"Don't think your dad should see you like this Bells, I mean hell," He rubbed the back of his neck.

"You should take me to Sam Jake."

He was frowning at me again, the worry slightly higher than the confusion. "Maybe I should take you to the hospital."

"I'm fine Jake. Just take me to Sam and Paul please."

"Bella?"

"Jake." I huffed, I really didn't want to have this argument with him again. Imprint or not, I loved Paul. He was my soul mate. He was my choice.

Jake shook his head but took me to Emily's and when I saw Sam frowning at us as he stepped off the porch my heart stuttered. Something wasn't right.

"Jacob, Bella." He nodded at us both and then turned to Jake, "You should take Bella home Jake."

Things started clicking in my head, it was late afternoon not late evening, Jake was confused I wanted Sam and Paul, Sam didn't think of this as my home. It was beginning to get hard to breath but the truth crashed into me in one painful, hate filled glare as Paul stepped out of the house.

I barely registered my knees give out as I dropped to the ground, staring at him.

"Paul." I breathed his name. It was the same prayer I'd been uttering for two months. This time it was going to go unanswered, the imprint wasn't just broken here, it didn't exist. I let out a garbled scream and felt Jacob reach for me. I didn't want him though, I wanted Paul, I wanted my family, Sam, Emily, Jared and Kim but they didn't love me either, I'd lost them all.

An electric wave of ice flowed through my veins. I'd never felt so cold, so alone. I didn't even notice Jake's warmth as he lifted me into his arms. He held me as Sam drove us to the hospital. I was deemed to be suffering hypothermia and a mild concussion. The hospital buzzed with noise and I couldn't stop shivering. I felt an agonizing cold that wouldn't go away.

Lying on the couch wrapped in blankets two days later, not having moved or spoken as I slept on and off, wrapped in dreams of being with Paul and the nightmare that had finally come true, the nightmare of my return to the normal world, the world where Paul hated me.

I shivered and stared at the phone. I picked it up and dialed the number I thought I remembered from that dream world. It took three tries for the call to actually connect to a number.

"Hello?" A sob burst forth as I heard his voice. "Hello?" He repeated, his voice softer and full of concern.

"Jasper." I breathed out my voice horse with tears and disuse.

"Bella?" I could hear the shock and worry.

"I need you."

He seemed to hesitate before a quiet, "Me?"

"Please." I bit back fresh tears.

"Give me a couple hours." He agreed readily, whatever he heard in my voice enough to convince him.

I nodded though he couldn't see and dropped the phone as I curled into a ball.

It could have been five minutes or five hours later that he was walking into my house.

"Jazz." I sobbed and sniffled.

"Bella." He hesitated at the door, feeling my emotions, then he came and sat on the couch near me. I took my bundle of blankets and sort of shifted, sort of flopped so I was leaning against his shoulder.

A few minutes later I was calm, wrapped in a warm bubble of comfort and affection though my whole body still shivered with cold.

Alice let herself inside some time later. "Bella?" She sighed moving to my other side.

"You saw me call him?"

"Yes. I also saw you needed just him for a minute."

"Why?" Jasper questioned gently, his confusion almost reverential awe.

It just reminded me that in this world we didn't share the same bond and I began to sob again.

"Bella?" Alice asked taking my hand.

I squeezed it, but my attention wasn't on her, or even Jasper and his soothing emotions. "I hate you." I whispered my eyes locked on the newest entry into my house. Edward. The other Cullen's were behind him.

He looked like I'd hit him and I wanted to scream, to tell him it wasn't me who wasn't good enough, it was him. He hadn't loved me enough, hadn't loved me right, and it was I who had deserved better. I had deserved Paul. I began to sob again because in this world, I didn't just have a broken imprint, I didn't have his love either.

A wave of calm and comfort, of love flowed through me in a powerful wave and I sighed leaning against Jasper again. "I hate all of you." I whispered, sniffling leaning into Jasper more, burying my face against the lie. I loved them, I didn't want to, not now, not when they had hurt me so much and not when it was because of a vampire I had lost Paul.

"You don't." Jasper whispered back.

"Jazz?" Alice asked tentatively.

"Talk to me Bella."

"You said once I was worth it." I reminded him.

"You are."

"So are you." I sniffled.

"Bella?" He shifted back and tilted my face with one cold finger so our eyes met.

"You are so much stronger than you let yourself believe. So much better and stronger than anyone else I know." I smiled and sniffled biting back more tears. "I had to tell you," I shook my head, "I never got the chance before, not ever before and I needed you to know," My words stumbled over a sobbed breath as I continued, "I wish I could have known you more wish you could know how much you meant, will always mean to me." I tried to focus only on the emotions I felt for him but knew the pain and sadness of the imprint was still there, that indescribable never-ending emptiness.

I felt as he bounced feelings of wonder, awe and affection back to me, each one mixed with concern.

"What do I do now?" I whispered to him quietly, still ignoring the others in the room.

"What ever you want." He answered without thought.

"A different life, a world I dreamed, or to forget everything to excise the broken portion of my soul and start new."

"Do you want me to change you?" He asked surprising all of them.

I paused as I thought, licking my lips and answered honestly, "I don't know." An eternity with Jasper and Alice but without Paul? He already hated me but to live forever without my soul mate? To live forever with this pain?

"How did you get his number?" Alice asked breaking the silence a while later.

"He gave it to me," I sighed through fresh tears, "In a dream of another life. A better life." The tears began spilling onto his shoulder as I leaned into him, all but lost in the bubble of calm that couldn't fill the black hole in my soul left by Paul's absence there.

"Are you ok?" Rosalie asked with concern that surprised me, or would have if I could have felt anything besides the calm of Jasper.

I shrugged, "Jasper?"

"Dancing on the edge of complete emotional overload." He answered quietly. "Even with my gift."

I nodded as a tear escaped, the sadness slipping through even his control. "I think I fell over it." I whispered thinking of the fall over the cliff that sent me tumbling back to this world, at least in the other, Paul still loved me, even if the imprint was broken.

Jasper gave a slow nod as I sighed and leaned back against him. Lethargy flooded into my veins as my eyes drooped shut. A few minutes later I vaguely recognized the prick of a needle.


	11. Chapter 11

When conscious thought returned, I found myself in a hospital room. There were no beeping machines or medicines but it was unmistakably a sterile hospital room. A nurse came in and gave a warm smile; she seemed surprised when I addressed her.

"Where am I?"

"New Haven Hospital."

"New Haven?"

"I'll send for your doctor." The nurse backed out of the room and a few minutes later a kindly looking man came in.

"Isabella?"

"Bella." I corrected.

"Yes of course." He smiled at me. "It's good to see you up and about, how are you feeling today?"

I shrugged, "Am I sick?"

"No." He shook his head, "Not physically."

"Mentally?" I questioned, had all of it been in my head, the Cullen's, the Pack, both worlds of heartbreak?

"You suffered an emotional breakdown but we believe you are on your way to recovery, that in waking, your mind is now better able to cope with whatever trauma you experienced to cause your mind to close in on itself."

I nodded slowly, "This is a mental hospital isn't it?"

"New Haven is a Psychiatric Care Hospital." He confirmed.

"Can I see my parents?"

"Your mother is still in Florida but I'm sure she'll come back when she hears you are awake. Your father has been informed and is already on his way. If you'll consent to it, your medical doctor would like to give you a checkup in the mean time and then maybe we can talk?"

I nodded giving him a weak smile, he just nodded and disappeared. Dr. Cullen walked in minutes later.

I closed my eyes and breathed in, pain clenching my heart, "It was all real?" I asked in a whisper only a vampire could hear. As my eyes opened I saw him give a small nod.

"How are you feeling?"

"I don't know. Empty."

Carlisle moved to examine me, "Tell them nothing."

"I'd never," I promised with a shake of my head, "I'd be locked up forever, you don't have to worry."

Carlisle shook his head and clarified, "Not that, we know you'd never." He gave a weak smile and continued, "They are going to ask about the trauma that sent you into that state, tell them you remember nothing. The doctors will assume it is your minds way of coping and letting you move on with your life. After a brief period of observation, if they see you can adjust to life, they'll release you."

I nodded my understanding of his whispered advice, taking his words to heart. In all the sessions I was sent to over the next weeks I talked about my childhood, life with Charlie, being with Edward and then claimed blankness over that entire last day or rather, the entire last two years in my mind and heart.

I forced myself to behave normally and was grateful that Jasper and Alice visited daily, the boost of Jasper allowing laughter and giving all the doctors the impression I was like any nineteen year old. NINETEEN! I'd been there for months. They let me study and write my GED to graduate, and on that same day my diploma arrived, they gave me my release papers from the hospital.

I hugged Charlie, Renee and even Phil, but left, as was previously agreed, with Jasper and Alice. The doctors had deemed them both wonderful influences on me and Charlie still loved Alice. He seemed to like Jasper as well. Carlisle was still respected and Esme received only a blush and nod. No other Cullen was mentioned or visited. Charlie and even Renee still hated Edward and blamed him for my emotional break. The final catalyst, Paul, remained a mystery to all except me, it was a pain I couldn't share.

The winter passed with friends of Jaspers, human drinkers named Peter and Charlotte, I liked them well enough and cherished the time I was able to spend with Jasper and Alice but as spring came I knew the answer to the question he'd asked the previous spring.

"I don't want to change." I whispered into the night, feeling as Jasper came out onto the porch where I was looking up at the stars.

"I know." He sighed, then responded to what I was feeling but I hadn't said "I'll miss you too Darlin."

I turned, unable to stop the tears in my eyes even if I cared to try, I gave him a sad smile. "I love you so much, you and Ali, I can't even…"

He nodded and sent a wave of comfort and love, "I know, we both do."

I sniffled and nodded, turning back to the moon.

"You have my number, if…"

"I wont change my mind."

"For any reason."

The words were the same as from that other life bringing tears back to my eyes as I nodded, he wouldn't leave me without a link, not again and neither would Alice. "Goodbye Jasper."

He hugged me tucking my hair behind my ear, "Goodbye Bella."

Alice came out and hugged me as well, "I can't stay and watch you leave." She explained her eyes brimming with venom.

"Ali…"

Alice shook her head, "You're my best friend Bella. Forever."

"You're mine too Ali."

Alice hugged me again, "I packed you a bag, it's not much, just enough for you to carry on your bike."

Peter and Charlotte smiled and nodded in farewell and all four ran off into the night.

I curled on the sofa and slept my last night in Montana and the next day, dawning warm and sunny, I climbed onto the bike Jasper and Peter had built for me and pointed it towards the other goodbye I needed before I could even attempt to move on with my life. It wouldn't mean anything to them but like in that other life where I'd gotten my goodbye from the oblivious Cullen's, I needed my goodbye even if these wolves were oblivious as to why it mattered or just how much I loved them.

At the reservation I rode straight to Sam and Emily's.

"Bella?" Emily seemed shocked to see me as she came out onto the porch at the sound of the bike.

I gave her a tight, pained smile, an ache in my heart for the sister I had lost in her, "Can we talk?"

"Sure." Emily nodded, waving me in. Kim was already in the kitchen sitting at the table, they were looking over baby books.

"Are you pregnant?" I asked Emily grinning; I knew she'd wanted so badly to have her own family with Sam. Emily nodded and I hugged her biting back tears of joy and the sorrow at knowing I'd never be auntie to her baby, never even be part of the little one's life, not in this world.

We sat down to tea and I sighed as part of me relaxed into this old routine and ached so badly for what I had lost. I hadn't ever planned on telling anyone but sitting there in the familiar kitchen with my friends I couldn't hold it in. I told them everything, from the moment I'd first jumped off the cliff through to waking up in the psychiatric hospital months after returning to this world.

Emily and Kim sat in stunned silence for a long time, each woman clutching one of my hands.

"You can still feel it?" Kim whispered. "The imprint?"

"I can feel the break." I clarified, "The empty place where the bond was and I've felt cold ever since. You were my sisters, your mates my brothers." Tears stung my eyes, "I can't even, begin, to explain, to describe that bond. To tell you what I lost in all of you. Paul." I sucked in a pain filled breath, then closed my eyes against the wave of loss biting back the sob and taking a moment to collect myself before trying again, "It hurts to breath." It was the only thing I could think of to tell them to explain.

When Sam and the other wolves arrived with the setting sun they found the three of us, hands still clutched as we sat at the kitchen table in darkness, matching sorrow etched on our faces as though the two women with me could feel the bond I had lost with them, the one they had missed out on having.

"Bella?" Jacob questioned quietly, the first to speak, his voice broke the spell and, with one final squeeze we released each others hands.

I nodded to them, to remind them of their promise never to speak of this, never to tell the wolves, to tell Paul, of what he was to me. If in this life he felt no pain because of our broken bond then I was glad. I didn't want him to suffer even the knowledge of what might have been. I turned to the pack, "I came to say goodbye."

"Bella." Kim protested.

I turned to her with a shake of my head willing her to understand, "I can't." I gave the two women a sad smile, "I miss you." They both nodded, grief etching their faces. I turned back to Jacob, "Thank you for trying to heal me, for being my friend."

"Bella?"

I ignored the question in his eyes and turned to Jared and Sam, "I don't even have words. I couldn't even begin to, even if you could understand but you can't, I'm not sure if that makes this worse or just makes it possible. I know all of this makes no sense to you and you probably wouldn't believe me if I tried to explain but I had to say goodbye, to tell you how much you and your mates will always mean to me. I love you." With a steadying breath I turned to look at Paul, all of the wolves were staring at me in confusion and silence. I opened my mouth to speak but no words came to me, I closed it and tried again, silent tears slid down my cheeks and still I couldn't speak. I had no words. My soul still cried for him and I just couldn't force myself to say the words. I closed my mouth and nodded to him, then slowly and painfully walked out of the house and to my bike. I had one last stop, the cliffs.

I stood on the edge and sank to my knees, the tears I refused to wipe away still flowing, "Why?" I knew my voice was broken as I begged the universe for an answer. None came. After a while the tears dried up and with a sniffle I got up and returned to my bike riding away from Forks, this time promising myself it would be the last time I returned to that cursed place that had given everything and then taken it all away, leaving a broken shell behind and because whatever cruel deity was there enjoyed it, the universe somehow made it happen twice, the second love deeper, more profound and thus the break that much deeper.


	12. Chapter 12

I settled in California and was accepted into university, a year passed and while every day I missed the people I loved, missed Paul, I began to build a life for myself. I couldn't bring myself to date, not when Paul filled my heart and soul so thoroughly but I made friends and at least in part, healed.

Fate it seemed wasn't through with me yet though, a fact made clear when one day I came home to find Sam sitting on my front steps.

"I have a son."

"Congratulations."

Sam nodded, "Jacob imprinted."

"Good for him."

"So did Paul."

My heart stopped and squeezed into a tight ball, my lungs felt like they were in a vice as pain unlike anything I'd ever felt rushed through me.

I gave a slow nod to the silently watching Sam.

"You already knew that of course." He finally added on.

I frowned at him, spots dancing in my eyes from lack of oxygen as his words repeated themselves in my head, Paul had imprinted.

"Bella?" I sucked in a breath as he jerked my arm hard.

The breath came out in a shudder as a tear slid down my face. Paul had imprinted.

"Damn it." Sam swore, pushing himself away from me, his body slightly shaking, "It is fucking true isn't it?"

"Sam?" I fought past the pain and focused on him, confused.

"Emily told me." Sam answered accusingly, "The girls told us everything." He spat out.

"Oh." I felt shaky, I needed to sit down, did that mean Paul didn't imprint? Moving past him I opened the door to the house that had been converted to apartments and led him to the one I rented. Inside I sank onto the couch. "So did Paul…" I couldn't bring myself to actually say it.

"You tell me." Sam demanded.

I nodded slowly, "In another life." The words were painful.

"Damn it Bella." He cursed. "Tell me everything."

I shook my head and sniffled but began to talk, telling him the same story I'd told his mate several months before.

"Why did you leave?" Sam asked after I finally finished, his voice gentle and kind as tears streamed down my face.

I looked up at him, our eyes meeting, "Don't you understand?"

"What?"

"The way he looks at me," fresh tears burned their way down my cheeks as I saw again in my head the hatred in Paul's, "That hate," I sucked in air, panting as I felt the vice around my lungs tightening making it hareder to breath, "I can't… can't." I felt myself start to hyperventilate as sobs wracked my body. No matter the time that passed, no matter the healing, it still hurt, I still loved him, with all that I was.

Sam shook his head and ran his hand through his hair in frustration and sympathy but I could also see in his eyes the fear that came with the new possibility that an imprint could be broken.

"Please come back with me."

"I can't." I shook my head wiping at the tears, I couldn't face him, I was just barely recovering, starting to live and be ok on my own.

Sam took the choice from me with his next words, "He needs you."

I nodded and stood without another word. If Paul needed me, I'd go. I'd suffer anything for the man I loved, even if he didn't love me.

Sam helped me pack a bag and load it into his rental car to go to the airport. Seven hours later and I was sitting in his living room surrounded by the pack.

"It's not possible." Embry snorted.

Jake hugged his mate to him, he'd only just found her, an imprint was supposed to be forever, he didn't want it to be possible either but they had to know.

"Paul has always been affected by her, we'd shrugged it off but what if it is possible there was so much more behind it all? Was Bella his intended imprint?" Jared questioned quietly.

Paul just glared at me, while I watched him from lowered lashes, one hand held tightly in Emily's and the other in Kim's as I fought back the tears.

"What if it is?" Leah asked looking from me to Paul and back before her eyes shifted to Sam and Emily.

I shook her head, "It was another life, another world, a dream." A tear escaped my control and slid down my cheek.

"This is insane." A woman I didn't know, standing with Brady protested. "Imprints can't be broken. We all know that."

I turned to look at her and gave her a small smile, "Stay away from vampires and you never have to find out." The girl just snorted in answer.

"Can we talk about the part where you survived a vampire bite?" Leah cut in sending a glare to Brady's mate before focusing a slightly nicer look on me.

I nodded, "Jasper," I sighed shaking my head, that was wrong, at least in this life, "In that world it was Jasper, in this one Edward, both times I was bitten by James and they sucked the venom out before I could change." I lifted my wrist to show them the hated scar, the mark and permanent reminder of what had taken my life with Paul from me.

"So no getting bitten from a vampire and we and the imprint with our wolves will be fine." Jacob's mate smiled slightly.

Leah snorted, "Yours maybe but not hers with Paul."

"He didn't imprint." Embry insisted. "If he's never going to because of this then who cares, he's free."

I took in a breath through my nose to calm myself as a shiver ran through my body and tears stung my eyes but nodded in agreement with him, "In this world."

"In this world?" Kim questioned gently.

"Not in the other?" Jared frowned from his mate to me.

I shook my head in answer, "He, he felt me die when James bit me." A few tears escaped, "He felt the imprint break, we could both feel where it used to be," my voice trailed off, no longer speaking to anyone as I relived it in my head, just describing it to myself, "the empty, cold, fear, loss, need. We didn't want to be free." A shiver shook my whole body bringing me back to the moment, "In that world, he loved me, that wasn't broken."

"We could fix it." Leah was the one to speak, surprising all of them.

"You want to help her? The leech lover that brings vampires here, admittedly almost got herself and Kim nearly killed and then latched her crazy onto Paul?" Brady's mate spoke up again. "Seriously? And you of all people?"

"She's pack." Kim argued.

"No she isn't." Jacob's mate agreed with Brady's. "Lara is right, for all we know this was all cooked up in her mind at the mental institution."

"Sophie." Jacob protested gently. "Bella wouldn't make this up, she never even liked Paul before I pulled her out of the water.

"You saw her go under Jake, it was what, three minutes? Do you really think that in that time she travelled to a parallel world for two years?" Sophie responded gently.

"She's a nut job. Running with leeches should be evidence enough but the rest of this. I mean seriously, even if it is partly true, who cares, she isn't Paul's mate now." Collin snorted.

A growl from Paul surprised them all. "Paul?" I questioned meeting his eyes for the first time.

"You… affect… me… oddly."

I tilted my head, frowning in question, "Oddly?"

Paul nodded, "From the first time our eyes met, when you hit me… I felt…" he seemed to search for the word, "Betrayed."

I bit back tears and nodded, I'd already been bitten when we met in this life, bitten and mourning another, a vampire, his enemy and a boy who tried to make me what he could love instead of loving me. "I'm sorry."

"Do you really feel the imprint?"

My eyes though welling with tears met his unblinkingly as I nodded, "I feel its absence, your absence, everyday, every minute. It…" The tears spilled down my cheeks unchecked as I tried to explain, "I'm so cold and it hurts to breath." I sniffled, "I love you." I shook my head as my voice trembled with emotion, "Always and forever." I sucked in a painful breath to continue, "It's better that you don't though."

"Better?" He was frowning at me but his eyes registered only confusion, no hate, even a little concern and the resemblance to the way her Paul looked at me made it almost to painful to bear.

"You hurt before. When you loved me. After… when you felt me die… you were so angry and hurt and broken and I hated that… I… it's better for you not to love me because maybe its why you're free, why you don't feel the break. Your hate for me protects you."

His eyes searched mine for a long moment before he whispered his next question, "What protects you?"

I shook her head as more tears fell, "Loving you, being pack, made me strong, losing that, even just the memory of it would be worse than even this pain because I might not know what I missed if I didn't remember loving you, even for just a moment."

"Do you think, in that world, we'd have fixed it?"

I shrugged but told him the truth, "You, Sam and Jared, you'd have tried everything but in the end I think we both knew it couldn't be fixed."

"Did you leave me then?"

"Never. I love you and you loved me, that was forever."

"You left me here." He shook his head as though trying to connect invisible dots, make sense of things that couldn't make sense.

"You don't love me here."

"I could."

It was to painful to hope for and the truth had always been simple, "You hate me."

"I wanted to." He admitted, "Mostly I hated that I couldn't seem to really hate you. I hated that you were close with Jake, that a leech had touched you, that you had let him and I hated that you weren't mine. I think I blamed you for that."

"You should. It's my fault. I should have been your imprint."

"I could still love you."

I shook my head again, willing myself not to fall to his feet and simply beg him to love me to swear to be anything he needed or wanted if only we could be life we were in that other life. "Why would you want to?"

"Apparently you might be my soul mate."

"I know." I sniffled again and wiped at the tears on my cheeks, "And I hurt you so much."

Paul shook his head, "You hurt too."

I nodded and wiped my other cheek even as fresh tears blurred my eyes, as much as I wanted what he suggested, I couldn't so that to him. I'd spent so much time thinking, trying to move on with my life but I'd also examined the past, both of them, and I'd come to a conclusion about the truth of my fate. "The thing is, I think I cheated fate, twice and I'm not sure how long I can do that."

"Bella?" Kim questioned breaking the silence of the pack around them, the bubble they'd been in.

I shook my head, my eyes not leaving Paul's, "All this year I've been thinking about it all and I think, maybe, that I wasn't supposed to survive, that maybe fate's plan, the one I messed up, wasn't about Edward or you, who I was supposed to love or how that love would change me, change us. I think I was supposed to die."

"Not die dear." We all turned to the woman who had so silently appeared.


	13. Chapter 13

"You." I breathed as I looked at the angel or demon of fate that had given and then taken away my Paul.

She nodded sadly and turned to Paul, "Your love for her was meant to change you, to heal you and yes, partly to break you in a new way, to cement your place and your future as Enforcer of this pack, you will make it so much stronger and your hate for vampires would be tempered by compassion and love."

"Mom?" He breathed.

The woman turned back to me even as I repeated Paul, breathing out the word in a question, "Mom?"

The woman nodded, "In my life, I was his mother but my fate took me from him too soon, he's been angry with the world ever since. His fate was altered when your life shot off course but its not just his fate altered Bella, it's yours too. The Cullen's changed your fate, both your love of them and their love of you."

"I don't understand."

"You and my son were an ill-fated match." She smiled sadly at them both. "Star-crossed lovers written by the fates themselves, your love for each other would change you both, instead your destiny led you to Edward and his choices upon meeting you, his unexpected will to have you for himself, changed destiny. The love you shared with Edward was destined to change you both but your fate was still sealed. Your fate with this pack and in part with Paul was unchanged. Even in his hatred, he has loved you and knowing you has changed him and through Jacob, all of this pack. "

"So I was fated to lose Paul?"

She shook her head, "You were fated to change the pack, initially through my son and then when your destinies led you and Edward together, through Jacob, their love of you strong enough to temper the hate of a species. This new tolerance, acceptance even, of vampires and of themselves would lead to pride of their history instead of resentment and the tribe, the pack would grow stronger both in this generation and the ones to come."

"I don't understand." I shook my head, the fates were so cruel that I had been meant to be broken by love, by Paul and then when that plan had gone sideways, by Edward? Then because I hadn't been broken enough they had me live their original plan as well? "Why was it my fate to lose him? Why let me love Paul so much only to take him again? Is it my fate to be broken? Wasn't I broken enough with Edward, you had to show me what love really was, what being broken truly meant?"

"No. Bella." Her voice was gentle and her eyes held oceans of sadness. "Loving him was meant to be a gift."

"I want him back." I begged her. "Please, please give it back."

"I wish that I could, sweet child, I would be blessed to have my son loved by a woman like you but his fate is with another and your fate, its path can still be corrected and I promise you, that one day, your heart will heal and be whole again."

"What is this fate then?" I demanded, "What if I don't want it? You said I had the chance to change fate, so change it, give me back Paul."

"Even if I could, you would only lose him again"

"Why do I have to lose him?" I closed my eyes against the soul wrenching pain of her words.

"Your fate can only change so much, your time will come and one way or the other, you will be parted from him."

"I love him."

"I know." She smiled sadly at me again.

"It wasn't enough time." I begged her again, "Couldn't we have more time?"

"There is no more time." She apologized, "Even if I could fix it, could you steal from his mate the chance to love him? Or from him the chance to love her and their children?"

Tears ran freely down my face as I begged the only thing left to beg for, "Tell me she loves him right." If Paul was happy and loved, I could maybe survive. He'd suffered enough in this life, he deserved everything good it had to give and if I couldn't love him, I prayed that whoever she was could.

"Their love will match yours, given the time and opportunity to grow. They and their children will be very happy."

I nodded, the words were little knives in my heart but as I closed my eyes against the tears and pain, I thanked the fates that Paul would know a happy future. Slowly I nodded even as more tears slid past my closed eyes, "He deserves that. He deserves to be loved, to have children, to be happy." I met her eyes, my own still swimming with tears, "Is it soon? Will find her soon?"

"I'm pregnant." Leah cut in, her voice quiet and tentative.

The woman smiled at Leah and something clicked in my head as I turned to Leah, pain rocketing through me as their eyes met, "Paul?" The slight nod was a knife in her heart.

"Bella." Paul cut in gently.

I shook my head at him but my eyes held Leah's, "Love him well."

"It was only one night. We didn't know." She tried to explain, "I'd never wish this on anyone Bella, not my cousin and not you." Leah licked her lips, "If there's a way to fix the imprint for you, to heal your pain, I'd help, even now." Her eyes pleaded with me, "Emily only told us what she knew after, when I went to tell Sam I was pregnant. If we'd known... we wouldn't have... we would have brought you home, never let you leave."

"I know." Looking into Leah's eyes, I did know, Leah had never really liked me, not in either world but Leah knew what heartbreak was and she would never wish that pain on anyone let alone the break of an imprint. "Just love him well."

Leah nodded, her hand going to her stomach and in her eyes I could see, she did love Paul, maybe not the way I did, not yet, but she would and her promise of "Always" was bittersweet because as much as it hurt to know she'd have him and he would love her, I knew he'd be ok.

I nodded to Leah as tears flowed down my cheeks and turned to Paul, "Forever."

He nodded at me and I could see remorse in his eyes, "I'm sorry."

"Just be happy Paul, love her and protect her and know part of me is always yours… as your friend."

He nodded, his eyes swimming with turmoil and regret for things that would never be, a life and love he never got to live.

"The path fate plans for you, it will lead to love again." I shook my head, I was to broken to ever love again, to full of Paul. "You will heal, little one. I promise."

"So what was this master plan, fate had, to break an imprint?" Jacob's mate asked quietly, "Its not supposed to even be possible." She clutched Jacob's hand. "We're supposed to be forever."

"You can't take them from us." Embry's imprint agreed, clutching her wolf.

"Fate has a bigger plan for her and often greatness comes as a great cost."

"You broke an imprint." Jake growled, "what bigger plan does fate have to break someone so thoroughly as to take away the single most precious gift the ancestors give us?"

"It was her fate to be a vampire wasn't it?" It was Kim to voice the soft question.

"Yes." The woman nodded and turned back to me, "Now, you have the choice, to change your fate or accept it."

I sucked in a breath at the realization, whatever path I had followed, the Cullen's or the wolves, I had been bitten by James. I knew my eyes were wide with shock as I whispered the truth, "I asked Jasper to suck out the venom."

"You did, you see now how your destiny changed but led to the same fate and like I told you before, you can choose to change fate, altering the fates of many for generations to come or you can accept the plan fate had for you."

"Do I have to choose now?"

The woman gave a sad smile and nodded, "I'm afraid this is the changing point in your life, the moment the fates of many will alter forever or must be set upon, including yours."

"She will love again?" Emily interrupted, the question part demand.

The entire pack seemed to hold their breath until Paul's mother smiled, "A love that defies time."

"Paul was my soul mate." I reminded her shaking my head, I couldn't love again, not the way I loved him, not even the way I had loved Edward. I was to broken now.

"Yes, and your love for him was pure but your love for Edward was almost as strong."

"I know and now I'm broken."

"You are stronger than you know and you will love again, your true mate will heal your soul and while my son and even Edward will forever mark their places in your heart, you will be whole again."

I shook my head, even the thought of loving again hurt. "I can't love again."

"You can, you will, and he will be your soul mate."

I shook my head and reminded her of the undeniable truth, "Paul was my soul mate."

"We don't only get one soul mate Bella, and you will meet others who connect with you on a soul deep level, either as family, a lover or someone who is fated to change your life. Indeed you have already met more than two of yours."

"Who?"

The woman nodded, "Edward, Paul, Alice, Jasper and..."

"And?"

The woman smiled sadly, "James."

"James?" I all but spat the word.

She nodded again, "He was meant to be your maker Bella. That was your fate."

"He's dead." I couldn't drum up even the tiniest feeling of sorrow for that.

"Yes." She nodded, "He wasn't your soul mate as you think Paul was, nor as Jasper is but still a match to your soul."

"I was Paul's imprint."

"Yes, but Leah is his fate and his perfect mate. Most imprints are that to a wolf but not all, not you."

"Her perfect mate is still out there then?" Sam demanded. The concept was foriegn to them, everything they knew about imprinting said they were perfect mates.

Paul's mother nodded smiling, "They have yet to meet but they will and it will be a love that shines bright, strong and true for centuries to come. It will be a love that changes the world but while her fate is still set, her destiny can change that path so the future is a mystery and not something I can reveal." She turned her full attention back to me, "Of course, some fate is good and some is bad, this pain was part of your fate and I'm sorry for it. James was meant to turn you and now you have the chance to change that fate or to embrace it."

"James is dead." I reminded her again.

"Yes, but Victoria isn't and it is still his venom that flows in her veins."

"If he'd changed me in that other life would I have returned here changed?"

"That life was a glimpse Bella, not a life, what happened there cannot carry over here; it cannot change what has been."

"So how do I decide? I mean, what do I do to accept or deny this fate?"

"Soon, it will come to you."

She turned back to Paul, "I am so proud of you my son. I have been and will be watching over you." As though they had all blinked at the same time she disappeared, there one second and gone the next.

I knew in my heart that what she meant when she said I would lose him one way or the other, I would either become a vampire, or he would be burying me. I turned back to the pack but my eyes sought out Sam, "I know you don't remember but you were my brother, I went to you for guidance and advice, I need that now. Please. Sam. Tell me what to do."

Sam gave a grim smile and gave the barest shake of his head, "Whatever you decide the pack will be here for you, we will support you."

"Even if I…"

He nodded, his face serious as stone, "We will keep you from hurting anyone and we will protect you from being hurt."

"Why?"

"You're one of us." Emily answered for him.

"Always." Paul added.

"Forever." Leah agreed.

"Bella?"

I turned to Jake and as our eyes met and I saw the love still in them for me, I smiled, Jake would love me even if I was his mortal enemy, "Thank you."

"It seems we have a lifetime of missed memories to make up and if Paul's ghosty fate lady mom is to be believed, not a whole lot of time, so let's get eating." Jared broke the sad silence making us all chuckle.

"A bonfire to celebrate the newest imprint?" Sophie, Jake's imprint, suggested.

"I'm not though." I corrected her, I wasn't an imprint and in this life, I never would be.

"The newest to us anyways." Jared shrugged "And it's brilliant."

"I'm not an imprint." I reminded him.

"Yes you are." Paul's voice was hard and denied any argument. My eyes met his and I nodded in agreement, my heart still aching with the loss of him.

"Come on." Leah linked our arms, "I might need tips on dealing with the ass hat."

I couldn't help but laugh even through the tears still stinging my eyes, "Sure, sure."

At the Jake-ism reply I saw all the pack smile sadly. I was getting my goodbye with the pack and the life I'd dreamed of with them as in the other life had given me a goodbye with the Cullen's and the life I'd once dreamed of with them. It was bittersweet misery, letting go of a love I wasn't ready to say goodbye to.

That night was perfect. We ate and laughed and told stories and for a few hours I felt as though both my past worlds had collided, I had my Jake but Sam, Jared, Kim and Emily as well. Being with Paul was bittersweet, he was neither the man who hated me nor the one who loved me but the man I met that night was a new Paul, Leah's Paul and though my soul still mourned him, I also felt almost happy for them and my heart swelled with love for them both and hope for their coming child.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hey all, so quite a few people have mentioned that this is labelled a Bella/Paul story and shouldn't be now. IT IS a Bella/Paul story. I never said it was a fluffy story in the description and I never said it they got an HEA. In fact the very title is Fated to _BROKEN_ love. I did not label it a tragedy because no one has _died _and to me its about love and sometimes having to let go and move on. She was broken after Edward and thought he was her forever but she found true love with Paul. ****This is the story of the love Bella shared with Paul, much like in my take, Twilight was the story of the love she shared with Edward, which ended painfully for her as well but the story would still be labeled Bella/Edward because it was the story of their love. **Circumstance meant that didn't last either but the story is about things happening for a reason and silver linings, its about hope and love. True love doesn't always mean you end up together. Life doesn't always have an HEA but it doesn't diminish the love we feel and I don't feel that because their imprint was broken, this hasn't been a story about a Bella/Paul love. **I'm sorry to those of you who don't like where I've gone. I did label it drama and there is a lot of drama.**

**Sorry, minor rant finished. I am sorry to those who don't like it anymore. Unfortunately I can't please everyone. ****Thank you for all your reviews. I especially thank those of you whose screen names I recognize from reviews of other stories I've written. You guys have stayed with me through several stories and breaks, all the ups and downs of my writing and I appreciate all of you. Criticism, praise and even your rants for the odd twists I can take are all welcome in my inbox at anytime. Even if I don't agree with them, like in the above because it IS a Bella/Paul love story. Ok sorry, I said the rant was done, on with the story...**

They all slept out on the beach and when I woke in the damp chill of the morning I walked through the mist to the cliff and smiled out at the horizon, for the first time in a long time I felt serene.

I had no idea of the plan fate had for me but I had hope. At the very least, the people I loved the most seemed to have beautiful futures, maybe I would to, Paul's mother had said I would love again and I could only hope this time I wouldn't lose it but one thing was certain, nothing could make me wish I hadn't loved Paul, even knowing the pain in losing him, I'd have lived it again. Truthfully, before Paul, I'd been ready to live the pain of losing the Cullen's again as well. Love was worth risking the pain that came from losing it.

As I thought I watched the sun rising up over the water, through the early mist and clouds, I knew I would be ok, given time. I knew it, but I wasn't ready for it. The thing with time, there never seems to be enough, not enough time with Charlie, not enough time with Paul, not enough time with any of them, but no matter how perfect a moment, how much you want to hold on to something, time keeps passing, moving forward, whether you are ready for it to or not. This was a fact of life, and because it was a fact of my life that bad things would happen before I was ready to face them, it was there that Victoria found me. I could feel her behind me and calmly turned to the red head and regarded her. Victoria seemed to be waiting for something, perhaps fear but all I felt was that same serene calm.

It wasn't until Victoria's teeth latched onto my neck that I screamed. The pain instant as she ripped through my flesh and fire trickled into my veins.

The wolves had already scented her and Paul ripped her off me. Through the fire I saw the pack tearing her apart as Sam lifted me into his arms.

"Hold on Bella." He begged.

"Suck it out!" Leah hissed. "She said they sucked it out."

Sam looked down at me, "What do I do."

"This is your fate." I could hear the voice of Paul's mother in my ringing ears and knew. I would change or I would die, this was to be my fate.

"It's too much." Paul was shaking, "She can't, she wont, you have to let her change." I could see in his eyes he knew and quickly understanding dawned on all of them. Victoria had gotten too much blood out, put to much venom in, they either had to kill me or let me change.

"Tell me what to do Bella." Sam spoke softly as he kneeled on the cliff top holding my writhing body.

"Do?" Paul growled, "You do nothing. Let her change, call the Cullen's, we said we'd protect her."

"We said whatever she decides." Jared corrected his voice rough with emotion.

"No." Jake growled, "You can't mean… No. You aren't touching her." His body was shaking, "I'll stop you."

"She'll be a leech man." Quil's quiet voice spoke up.

"Who cares, she'll still be Bella." Seth added.

"A leech is a leech." Brady argued.

"We should take her out now." Embry agreed.

"Touch my imprint and I will tear you apart!" Paul growled, his whole body shaking as he stood to protect her.

"Do you really want to leave her to suffer like this?" Colin waved at me, the pain was making my back bow as lava coursed through me and I lay writhing in Sam's arms, tears and cries of pain like nothing any of them had heard before escaping my lips.

"Enough." Leah hissed. "It's not up to us."

"Bella?" My vision was blurring but I turned my face from the pack to meet Sam's eyes, "You have to decide." He pleaded with me to take the choice from his hands.

"Bella?" I heard Emily's pained voice as the imprints made their way to the cliff from the beach below. I knew they were scared, and I knew in that moment they would rather me exist, even as this than to bury me, just like I'd rather see Paul happy with Leah than broken over what we had missed having. I turned from Emily and Kim's worried expression to look at Paul's haunted one and as ous eyes met a wave of pain rolled through me making me scream. Deep down, we both knew, I would become his mortal enemy and if he had hated the betrayal of our broken imprint because of them, how much would he hate me for being one of them? In that instant, the look in his eyes held my answer. Paul hadn't just recognized the broken imprint as a betrayal, it was the way I'd let Edward break me, the way I had given up living that was a betrayal. Now he was only moments from phasing, to guard over me, while I became his enemy because my death was something neither Paul could forgive. The imprint might be broken and he might not have loved me in this life but his soul knew that he would have and however much he hated vampires, he'd rather I was one than dead.

Sam's arms tightened around me. "Please." He begged again.

I knew they wanted to protect me, but what I would become, I prayed that not just Paul would forgive me, but that all these brave and beautiful people I had loved so well wouldn't hate me, "Jasper." I panted out before the pain could consume me, giving my final choice.

Life had done its best to break me, but I wasn't ready to give up and die.

Sam held her to him, hating the pain she was in. It was Jared who found the vampire in her phone and made the call.

They carried her to the border in the woods and waited, every painful twist of her body and moan from her mouth tearing at their hearts.

Finally Jasper arrived and stood just across the treaty line.

"I'm scared to move her." Sam whispered, still holding her tightly, "She's just seemed to quiet a little."

"You can't hold her for three days." Alice told him gently.

"We don't want to leave her." Kim sniffled, clutching Jared.

"She needs to be protected while she's like this." Jake fought back the trembling in his body to phase as he watched his first love suffer.

"We know you love her." Jasper sent out a wave of comfort, "We know how much all of you do but it will be better for her and safer for your tribe if we take her away now. I promise I will protect her."

Sam nodded and stood. Paul let out a growl and tried to take her from him.

"Paul." He hesitated as the shaking boy lifted her from his arms.

Leah rested a hand on his arm, "Give him a minute." She requested.

Sam nodded and they all watched.

"I wish I could have remembered loving you. I'm so sorry for everything. You'll always be my imprint, my soul mate, leech or not." He whispered into her ear and walked her over to Jasper. "She's your soul mate to." He told the vampire, meeting his eyes, willing his enemy to love and protect her. He had no choice but to give his trust but handing her over, how could he not have known loving her? How could he have passed that love over? Because she was a leech lover? Had he missed out on something so amazing that even here, the tiniest glimpse of what they could have been, broke his heart?

Jasper nodded and took her from him; "I will protect her, always."

Paul nodded, in his enemies eyes he saw something, a spark of understanding and respect and he knew, this demon loved his girl too and as he made the promise Paul swore, he wouldn't make the same mistakes with Leah. He'd love her right, the way she deserved, the way his sweet Bella had deserved. He wouldn't fail to protect his family, not the way he'd failed her.

Leaning down he smoothed the hair from her face and kissed her forehead, ignoring the vampire stench "I'm sorry." He whispered and stepped back, his body shaking violently. Jasper nodded at the other wolves and turned, running through the trees, Alice at his side and Bella, clutched in his arms. Behind him he heard the mourning howl of the wolves, one pain filled cry louder than the others.

They ran for hours until they reached a very secluded cabin and settled in to wait.

Alice brushed her hair and cleaned her up, dressing her in clean clothes. Jasper sent her waves of emotion he wasn't completely sure she could feel through the pain.

"Do you see anything Darlin?" Jasper asked Alice as they watched the girl they both loved.

"It's not clear." She answered leaning against him. "She'll stay with us though, at least for a while, even come back to the Cullen's with us in time and I see her happy. She'll be happy again." Alice reassured him and herself, seeking out the vision again. "She'll be happy and loved." She murmured as she reached out an took his hand, both of them waiting, unmoving, as they watched over her both silently promising that never again would they fail their sister, never again would she have to suffer alone and if they could help it she'd never suffer again but for now, for now they could only wait for their sister to awake to her new life.

**So this is the end of the Bella/Paul story.**

**I hope at least some of you liked it, even if it wasn't the ending you hoped for.**

**Please review, as I said, good, bad and constructive criticism are all always welcome. Even if this story wasn't to your liking I have more in my head so input is always helpful to my continuing writing! **


End file.
